Forum Replies Created
October 25, 2014 at 4:44 pm in reply to: Awkward Social Dynamics Challenge #3 – The male friend arrives #72135
I would look at the interaction between them, if there is kino, touch, etc. If there is no interaction between them as if they are couple, I would assume he is one of her friends. I guess in 2 minutes it is easy to understand it.
I think, “deep thought” opener is between direct and situational. It is a good opener if you know how to use it. Becasue I did not see it in real life, it is mistake to think only about the words. You know, body language is 70 % of communication.
I actually want to learn, how would you use it in different scenarios.
For example, in the street, you saw a girl waiting for someone in front of Top Shop. You walk in the street and get closer to her. When you are close enough to use the opener, do you stop, or do you wait for her response as you walk by. To me, if you stop in front of her waiting for her response, it is a big pressure for her. The best would be slowing down, saying the opener when you are 3 feet away, and if she is receptive, you stop, if she is not receptive, dont stop.
Surely, Lee can describe it best.
Better response would be “Are you available four weeks later?” without giving any reason and reframing her rescheduling. If she asks I could give her a reason.
If she says 3 weeks later, I would say, “actually in this week Im busy,I will be out of city. Are you available four weeks later?”
Difficulty in the street is not the opener. If you ask some location in the street like sushi restaurant, after she gives the direction, transition to more personal topics is very difficult. I made many approaches, but I wasnt successful. If you have experience, please give tips how to make conversation more personal, after the indirect opener. Lee has already gave one, but I could not try it yet.
Finding standing or sitting sets is more difficult than moving sets in the city where I live. No subway, no big parks, etc.
I generally daygame solo, and when I find a good set after walking alone for long time, I am not in social mood.
This makes the conversation difficult. If I talk 2-3 sets in short period of time, it becomes easier.
Thats why I prefer streets in the last months for daygame venue. On the other hand, most girls are moving which makes approaching more difficult.
How do you manage your mood, if you daygame solo? Actually you live in NYC, maybe its not difficult to find many approachable sets in short time interval.
Wow, very deep as expected from Lee. Actually, I prefer streets, because number of girls are more than enough to build momentum. I prefer indirect, because I am at least 10 years older than the girls I approach, as you clarified well. On the other hand, though I am able to get numbers in closed places like bookstores, supermarkets etc., I have difficulty on the streets.
My sticking point is killing their momentum on the street, because they are going somewhere, and they already have an agenda in their mind. If I say “Do you agree” and they give short answer, what is the best thing to do? Many girls are not “yes” girls and they are reluctant to initiate conversation with strangers on the street. Girl doesn’t know anything about me in the beginning. Do you think, I should assume there will be interest if I continue talking , even though she doesn’t comment at all. In addition, in order to apply what you suggest, body positioning is very important I guess.