Tell her to relax. You can say things like, “Take some deep breaths. You’re doing fine.” I like this a lot because it relaxes her and makes it seem like you’re in control. You can say this in any case, even if she doesn’t have anxiety and it puts you in the driver’s seat.
The other thing you can do is compliment her. This is a tricky one because it is very easy to compliment a woman too much. But a few nice compliments here and there can work wonders. As a rule, I stay away from physical compliments unless we are in bed or things are getting very sexual. The best things to compliment are things that are important to her, like her artwork/music or other things she is passionate about.
Another important thing you can do (and this is counter-intuitive) is to not give a shit about her anxiety. If you start to take care of her too much (“Are you okay?” etc.), she’ll become more self-conscious and start to disrespect you. You need to let her take care of herself. In fact, I’ve said to women, “You take care of your shit and I’ll take care of mine. You’re a big girl.” You can’t over-accommodate her or a lot of bad things start to happen.
Eric
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