Reply To: She ignores me when I ask her out

[The_Hurricane]

There is no advice that will help you with this girl. You’ve asked her out twice and she showed no enthusiasm for meeting you. The problem with asking her out more than once is that you lose some attraction every time you ask. What you’re telling us – that you have no one else you perceive to be as valuable as this girl – is exactly what you’re telling her when you continue to ask her out. She doesn’t perceive it as strength or manly persistence. She perceives it as weakness and need. The correct strategy is as follows. After she shows enough enthusiasm for meeting you, you ask her out once. I don’t even like to ask them out. I just tell them what time and day to meet me and see what they do. If they’re busy but want to meet me, they will suggest an alternative. After that first time asking, your chances of getting her out on a date drop significantly. However, if you want to convince yourself that you gave it every chance, what you should do is ping her occasionally – say every couple of weeks – without asking her out. Only when she shows enough enthusiasm for seeing you should you ask her out again. And by ask I don’t mean ask. I again mean tell. Tell her when and where to meet you. The way you did it – accepting a no then coming back to ask again – significantly lowered your chances because it made you look like a wuss. Doing it again will make you look like a bigger wuss. At this point, even pinging her is probably useless. Move on and do it right the next time.

–Lee