Reply To: Japan affair
The way I treat the interaction at the beginning is the same whether she’s dating three other guys or not dating anyone. I keep it casual. I’m the guy who makes her feel free, not pressured. Pressure will always work against you.
It’s difficult to tell how much she is into that other guy. But judging by the fact that she is hooking up with you, she’s probably not that into him. He’s probably pressuring her or they’ve been seeing each other for a long time and she feels like she should do try being exclusive with him.
I would keep things light with her. Keep it fun. Still connect. But let her take initiative with you. Let her chase after you. Let her be the one to call you up to hang out. End interactions first.
If she says, “We shouldn’t sleep together,” I agree with her. Say, “You are totally right.” And then keep sexually escalating with her while saying, “We shouldn’t do this.” It will make it a lot hotter for her and you’ll be twice as much fun as her boyfriend.