Reply To: girl did not want to meet after sex.

[The_Hurricane]

I want to comment on your first post about a situation in which a girl bails on you after sex. It’s a common problem and there could be many different reasons for it, but here is one modification to the script that you should consider making. Do not sleep over. Go home after sex. And if you have to sleep over, get up early, kiss her on the cheek, and get out of there. Usually, the sex is not the problem. The problem is the sudden sense of unplanned intimacy. A long date followed by a sleepover followed by lunch? Too much! It’s like you’ve been dating for a year. When a guy overcommits to a new relationship, girls discount his value based on the idea that he probably doesn’t have much else going on. Crowding her is a sure way to get her to lose interest. Remember, you always want to leave on an energy peak. There is no peak higher than sex itself. Leaving soon after that moment creates a sense of uncertainty that women find challenging and exciting. Staying the whole night and into the next day relieves that sense of uncertainty and makes them question your value. On the first few dates, you want the tension. You don’t want to give her absolute certainty of your interest. Of course, that goes double for asking her out right away. You should have waited for that as well. It’s a sign that you are the one looking for certainty, which should be her role, not yours.

–Lee