Reply To: eye contact

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Eric Disco

Really any kind of eye contact from women is a form of attraction. In the initial stages, attraction can be understood as attention. If she’s giving you attention, that’s a clear runway to take initiative with her.

You want to be careful though of waiting for ‘approach signals’ before approaching. This can lead to all sorts of problems, particularly for newer guys or guys with anxiety. Your anxiety will make you interpret every ‘signal’ as a bad signal.

You’ll think, she smiled at me but she didn’t smile enough. She looked at me but she didn’t look long enough or she looked away too quickly. That means she’s not interested. Or she looked down at her book. Your brain will come up with a million excuses for you to not take that action that scares you.

So I would recommend that at the start, you take small initiatives with women without first checking to see if she’s attracted to you. In my experience, her demeanor before I open her (whether she looks friendly or not) has about a 0% chance of determining how receptive she’ll be to me when I do open her. Could be that I’m not attractive enough to get approach signals or I don’t read them correctly, but I rarely rely on them before taking initiative.