Reply To: Closing in the library

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You approach a lot–do you usually ask these girls for numbers, or to get a coffee or whatever, and get shot down, or do you not get to the point of asking? I mean it sounds as if you’re getting somewhere with the “just start talking” piece of all this. Why not just bite the bullet if a conversation’s going ok and suggest a quick coffee break–maybe not right then if she’s busy but in an hour or so? Something like “Listen–I have to get at least another hour of work in for this [whatever you’re in the library for], but let’s go for a cup of coffee in a little while. I’ll need the break by then.”

It gives her an out (still busy), it’s low-pressure as it is a sensible thing to do, it shows some interest on your part, and it can bump you up in the “results” department.