Reply To: Your belief system
Well, whether you agree with me or with Lee about where the fear comes from, both of us agree that you’re not going to be able to talk or think it away–so yes, accept that it’s there and approach girls as much as you can anyway.
I do find that learning about where you own fears come from can be really helpful–and sometimes, if the fears represent something else, you can “unlock” them. After all that’s one of the fundamental approaches of analytical psychology–but ultimately yeah, you just need to keep talking to women and start experiencing some success–that will help to open your mind up and help lessen the fear.
As for the psychological aspect I find it interesting to explore forbidden zones of your mind–try to examine the things you dont allow yourself to think about–no matter how intimidating/scary they might be. Look at ways you acted a long time ago, and see if you can recognize patterns about yourself–or possibly when/if some things changed. Were you the type of person who never made eye contact, for example–or did something happen when you were 7 or 8 that made you act a different way towards people? Things like that. Ultimately, try to COMPLETELY understand yourself. This takes a long time. It is NOT AT ALL a replacement for interaction–but it can be a supplement to it that provides interesting information about yourself that you can use to change your relationships/behaviors towards people.