Reply To: "Deep thoughts" opener
I think this direct/indirect thing has to vanish–in my opinion it’s one of the most confusing things the “community” has ever come up with. I might post something on it.
I’m 40–you’re 32. Women expect us to be mature adults. A lot of “game” tactics area really immmature–I think those should be avoided. But if you’re referring to “direct” as sprinting up the street, grabbing some girl and saying “wow, you’re so hot I’d be kicking myself if I didn’t stop you and say hi”–yeah, that sounds like something a ballsy teenager would do. THat’s “chasing”, as you put it. It also doesn’t strike me as actually direct–you’re kind of going into character to do that.
But if you say something really honest–say you see a girl and there’s something about her look that’s really enticing–there’s nothing immature about saying so. For example: “Wow. You know, this might come off as a bit forward–I don’t even know if I can say this sort of thing around here! But you have the most striking look about you… I mean–I noticed from over there. Something about your….[whatever]”
It’s honest, it’s TRULY direct–but a mature, adult direct. I’ve tried it once or twice–people are honestly taken aback and flattered by this sort of thing. Because you really DO mean it–it’s not a cheap compliment to get her to talk to you. YOu’re saying: “Wow–there’s a reason I want to talk to you–and I’m damn well going to do it.” That’s not chasing at all–that’s simply putting yourself out there.
It’s really impressive to women. I wish I were brave enough to do it more often–that’s my ultimate goal–to be able to speak my mind whenever and whereever.