Reply To: Disappointing Trends
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What I mean by buy-in is some interest that might be considered more than trivial. They may ask you questions about topics you previously discussed, maybe when you first met. They may try to impress you by telling you about things they did. They may try to compliment you. I don’t consider “How is your day going?” to be genuine buy in. It’s too easy for them and doesn’t demonstrate that they’re trying. If they don’t give you that buy-in, make a statement and end it on that. For example, if they ask me how my day is going, I’ll respond with something clever – like “never, in five thousand years of recorded human history, has a man, prophet, or king had a better day than i” – but I won’t ask them about their day and I won’t follow up with another text. Sometimes, they will try again. If they don’t, I will wait and, if I really have nothing else going on, ping them again in a few days.
If they give me buy in, I don’t like to ask them out. I just tell them where to go and when, like this: “wednesday. 9pm. joe’s pub. epiphanies shall rain from the heavens” If they can’t make it, they suggest another time. Girls appreciate it when you take charge, even if they have to suggest an alternative. Some guys think they’re being considerate when they offer a bunch of options and ask girls what’s convenient. From my conversations with hot women, I’ve learned that they see this nothing but weakness.
–Lee