What to Do When You Need Motivation

You want this pretty bad.

I don’t have to tell you why you want to do this.

I don’t have to talk about how it feels to bring an amazing woman into your life.

From walking up to her, to giving her a kiss goodbye in the morning, to knowing she can’t wait to see you again–and you can’t wait to see her.

I don’t have to tell you that part. You know that part. You see beautiful women every day.

But sometimes the road ahead can seem so long. And the alternatives so easy.

You come home and you’d rather turn on the TV than go out and meet women. It’s much more comfortable.

You’d rather surf the web than open your mouth and talk to a stranger. It’s much easier.

It’s been a long day and you need to rest. You come home from work and just want to chill out. I know.

There seems so far from here.

But you know you want it.

You can’t be motivated by results. Seeking rewards can be a trap. You can’t do this from day to day hoping to get laid. It won’t happen.

So how do you motivate yourself?

It escaped me for a really long time. Every time I had to motivate myself to start again, I asked myself this question.

I get motivated by my friends. Having them there is a great way to keep going.

I get motivated by having goals. Wanting to change myself is powerful.

But when I’m sitting there, by myself, and there is a giant wall of lethargy separating me from what I want to do, there is only one thing that motivates me:

Action.

Action is the great motivator.

You cannot wait to become motivated, or you will wait forever. You become motivated after you start to take action.

When you’re sitting there, there is a lot of momentum in place to not do anything.

A body at rest tends to stay at rest.

You want to get motivated before you take the action, but it doesn’t work that way.

The way motivation works is that you start to take action, and then you become motivated.

Weird, right?

Once you actually begin doing what you set out to do, even the smallest of steps, you are no longer in the worst place to be: stagnate.

You are now experiencing the real world, taking in information. You feel yourself doing something instead of tossing the idea around in your head.

It’s similar, in a way, to getting past anxiety. If you don’t know how to deal with anxiety, the tendency is to want to kill the anxiety before you approach a woman. But it doesn’t work that way.

You start to have less anxiety after you approach women.

The analogy I used before was with my back pain. I injured my back. I wanted to rest my back until I’d recovered.

But I could rest all I wanted, my back wouldn’t fully recover until I started using it, exercising it every day.

The next time you find yourself in a place with no momentum trying to inspire yourself, instead of waiting around for the motivation to hit, start the action.

Yes, it hurts. If you haven’t gone out for six weeks, you will feel very unmotivated.

But instead of thinking and thinking about it, step outside your front door. Take a walk around. Breathe the fresh air into your lungs.

Get your feet moving. And your motivation will follow.

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posted in Initiative and Inhibition, Self-Improvement Strategies