How To Approach a Woman Who's Walking

It’s one thing to walk up to a woman standing somewhere and talk to her.

Or to walk up to a woman who is sitting down and ask if you can join her.

But how do you stop a woman who is walking? To some guys, it seems almost impossible.

But once you know a few basic ideas, it’s actually just as easy as approaching her when she’s not moving. Here’s how.

There are two basic things to focus on with stopping a woman who is walking: Familiar Voice Tone and Planting.

Firstly, let’s look at familiar voice tone.

Let’s pretend that you were out around town. And your best friend in the whole world just happens to walk by.

You totally did not expect to see him in that part of town. He doesn’t see you and walks quickly past. He’s now about twenty feet in front of you walking away from you.

How would you react?

You would walk briskly, run if need be, and catch up with him. You would tap him on the shoulder or arm and say “Hey!” with a very friendly voice tone.

As expected, he would turn to see who was tapping and saying hi. By the tone in your voice, he would expect it to be a friend. He would stop walking and turn around and talk to you.

This is exactly how it goes when you successfully stop a girl who is walking on the street.

The first thing to remember is to EXPECT success. I have learned a lot when it comes to pickup. I have read and practiced almost everything in the book when it comes to body language. The thing I come back to, over and over, is familiar voice tone.

You can visualize in your mind that this is your best friend whom you are approaching. How would you talk to him?

Confidence is EXPECTING success, expecting her to treat you as your best friend would, expecting her to be happy to see you.

And you know if you can act like you expect her to be friends with you instead of your enemy, she will be more open and friendly with you.

Where as if you greet her with a very subdued and guarded “Hey,” she will act guarded as well. It’s all in the tone of voice.

So that’s the first part, expect friendship, try to visualize how you would do it if you saw your best friend.

Familiar voice tone is important particularly when she’s walking. She has very little time to discern who is stopping her.

If your initial “Hey” says to her “I’m a friend,” she will be much more likely to turn and talk to you.

The second part is important as well. When she turns and sees you, you need to STOP WALKING.

You tap her on the shoulder or arm, a LIGHT tap. She turns.

By your body language, you need to show her that she needs to stop walking. You plant and start talking to her. You DO NOT walk with her.

This is where guys usually go wrong. If she continues walking, you do not follow her. You let her walk away from you.

A certain number of women will walk away. It happens to the best guys.

It’s good practice to just let her walk away.

Ironically, if you are ready to let her walk away, she will read your body language, see that you are planted and that you aren’t going to follow her, and she will stop.

It will feel rude to her to just walk away.

Do not ever follow a girl. It is creepy to follow her.

You plant. You stop walking. Your body language is telling her, I’m here, talk to me.

Using familiar voice tone and making sure you plant are the two most important things when stopping a woman who is walking.

I have done hundreds of approaches like this and it is rare that a woman will not stop and talk to me.

A few other things to keep in mind:

If she’s got her bag on the right side, you want to tap on the left side. Tap her on the side that doesn’t have her bag. This way she won’t think you’re trying to snatch her purse or something.

Try not to stare women down while you’re walking toward them. If she’s standing there and you walk up to her and stare her down at the same time, it’s too intimidating and high pressure for her.

If she’s ahead of you and you’re running after her, don’t stare her down either. You’re better off looking away.

She can sense it if you stare at her, even if she’s faced away. Whether it’s seeing reflections in the mirror or her seeing other people watch you, she knows.

You can practice the stop and opening by asking for directions. Or you can go full-on with something like “I was walking by and I just had to come tell you you are unbelievably cute!”

Say it with a bit of a smile on your face. She should light up.

It’s also possible to stop her when she’s walking toward you. But it’s easier to let her walk past and then go back and stop her from behind.

The reason is that it takes the exact right timing to stop her when you are walking toward each other. It can be done but it’s not as easy.

You may also need to take a step back if you are in her physical space when she turns around.

Or if you are too far away from each other after you both stop, it’s okay to take a few steps toward her and plant.

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posted in Body Language