How Does Approach Anxiety Feel to You?

by Eric Disco
Apr 27

One of my former clients talks about his approach anxiety:

“I’d been reading about how to do it for a while.

Finally one night I said to myself, all right, I’m going to go out tonight and I’m going to try to talk to girls.

I went out to this bar in my neighborhood. It was a Thursday night. A band was playing.

It was somewhat empty, maybe thirty people in the place.

I walked in and walked to the back to get a beer. That’s when I spotted this group of girls.

There were three of them, the only single women in the place.

My goal was just to open a conversation.

I was just going to go up to them and say ‘Hey, is this band any good?’ And then I’ll just go home after that.

I just couldn’t do it.

I stood there. And stood there. It felt like an hour passed.

Finally I just walked out of the bar.

As I was driving home I was so angry at myself that I was literally crying.

I thought, ‘Oh this is so fucking difficult, this is so fucking difficult. Why is this so difficult?'”


This really hits home for me. This stuff isn’t about just banging a few girls. It’s a lot more than that.

What does approach anxiety feel like to you? How has it affected your life?

Answer in the comments below.


posted in Initiative and Inhibition

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