What to do?

[The_Hurricane]

You can play the best game and still lose. You can play the worst game and still win. When dealing with human beings, you can’t be certain of anything. However, you have to realize that there are some situations – yours appears to be one of them – in which it’s better to risk losing her than to continue on a confidence sapping downward spiral. Each time you take a risk, it will be effective only if it is a bigger risk than the one you took last time, only if she is genuinely surprised by what happens. In other words, if you disappeared for a week last time, it has to be a month this time. Do women sometimes walk away? Yes. Do women sometimes play right back? Yes. But the alternative is worse: marching along like a lemming to the cliff of your romantic doom.

–Lee

[sangremala]

And that makes a lot of sense. Thank You.

[sangremala]

More or less my resurface time would be around Valentine’s Day. How should I handle Valentine’s Day?

[The_Hurricane]

You should ignore it. If, on Valentine’s Day, she texts you, wait until 2AM of the following morning, then text back “happy valentine’s day”. Your actions should imply you were either busy that evening or you didn’t consider it important.

–Lee

[sangremala]

Hey Lee I know you and everyone has tried to help me and I know you’re helping me because I wanted to get her back, but when im falling back I feel better, but around her im not cause I over think a lot. I have never had this problem in my life before and I am very unhappy. Even if I get her back, It’s like I had to game her because of the type of person she is. I feel like this situation is too complicated when it should of not been. I’ve been in relationships before and it’s been smooth the way I think it should. It Shouldnt be so complicated to be with someone. So im thinking if I should just let the whole thing go.

[MrAntiquity]

@sang: I’m not Lee, but you know what i think you should do? Dead honest here.

I think you should read through the entire thread–every question, every answer, etc. Then take two days away from the site. Then read the thread again–all 106 posts.

Then think about what you really want to do.

Remember the goal of the whole forum/game thing–it markets itself as “helping you get girls”. And it definitely does help there. But ultimately it’s about figuring out who you actually are and being free to live your life the way you want to.

[The_Hurricane]

I agree with Mr. Antiquity. I’ve been where you are. I gamed the shit out of a super hot girl and got her to give up her whole social life for me, got her to sever her connection with every other man in her life. But in the end, I got what I deserved. I came to the realization that I had to game this girl like no girl has ever been gamed before just to get what I could probably get with another girl with just a fraction of that effort. Did that make me feel better about myself, more secure? No way.

–Lee

[sangremala]

Soooooo

She’s been hitting me up. On Friday she text me again. She mentioned Valentines Day, but that she knows I didn’t ask her, that she wanted to wear something sexy and end up with the dress on the floor on top of me Blah blah blah

So my question is should I entertain it? Yes of course I want to bang her but im asking due to the shit I’ve been going thru with this one.

[SomeguyUK]

I’d say throw caution to the wind and go for it. This girl seems to be offering sex to you, once you’ve been there you are in a great position to decide what you want from the relationship.

If you do want to continue with her, things will get a lot easier after. If you don’t – at least you’re finishing in a stronger position and you can walk away with no regrets.

[The_Hurricane]

Give us some context. How long were you gone? When did you reappear? What has been the contact between you two since then?

–Lee

[sangremala]

About a month, I haven’t really reappeared. I saw her at a Lounge and I was talking to her brother and she popped up behind me on that hey stranger bullshit. Spoke for 1 minute. I said I been really busy. I was dressed nice. I was actually leaving and said got to run.

[sangremala]

Also as an update, I have been dating other women and having fun (I don’t really have much problem
Meeting and dating other women, I just didn’t because Im so invested) So certain things bother me less now. I have been doing me. Of course I still care about the girl but my situation feels different on a positive note.

Of course I want to smash especially since I havent on this time around with her, but I feel for some reason If I do something with her on Valentine’s that even included sex, it might do more harm then good.

[The_Hurricane]

I am split on this. Part of me says stay away on V day. “I’ll be out of town.” Mysterious. Makes her feel less important in your life.

On the other hand, if you can pull off the following, it would totally work as well: take her to a nice dinner in an expensive hotel, a late dinner, like ten o’clock. Tell her you’re staying there and there’ll be a midnight toast in your room. Meaning, make sure that you’re going to wind up in bed. Fuck the shit out of her. The next day, go back to your disappearing game. You can be just a little more available than you were when you fully disappeared. You can text her once a week or so, make plans for every two weeks. The idea of this V day option is to give her everything she wants WITHOUT the emotional certainty she wants. If you can pull it off, you’re back in the position of power. Stay away from the love talk. Treat her like a whore, not a lady.

–Lee

[sangremala]

I was starting to think that.

At least I get pussy out this whole bullshit. I am also dating so my state of mind has been a bit differentZ

[sangremala]

Should I tell her don’t make plans for Vday now? So that she doesn’t make other plans?

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