What are your current goals?

[SomeguyUK]

Thought it would be good for us to talk about what our goals are at the moment. It’s easy to form the habit of going out and practising, but I find sometimes I forget what I’m practising and just approach girls aimlessly.

I’ll start off.

Short term goal – dust off the cobwebs. I have been too busy to practise for a week and my AA has come back a bit.

Long term goals –

1. Reduce hesitation. I can approach most of the time, but often I need a minute to calm myself down and talk myself into approaching. I know this is a gamekiller, and sometimes the girl walks away before I can get myself together.

The only ways I can think of doing this are using the old ‘5 second rule’, and using the same opener every time as Lee suggests. I am trying to get comfortable with ‘deep thoughts’, but also considering just sticking to direct openers for a while.

2. Stay in for longer. I need to get used to staying in until the girl reaches a ‘decision node’, as Ryano used to talk about. I don’t know of any technique for doing this, other than telling myself not to leave.

3. Transition to personal conversation more. I think this ties in with the last one, because often to stay in longer you have to take a chance and get more personal.

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What are your goals and what are you doing to reach them?

[MrAntiquity]

My goal at the beginning was to date more women. My goal for the last few years when I realized that what was causing me not to act (approach, touch, escalate, whatever) was really a reflex, has been to weaken and ultimately (if possible) eliminate that reflex.

My approach to all this has always been about psychology.

[Cartoox]

@ some guy uk

Thanks for putting that up so clearly, I think you have stated what’s on my mind as well, points 1 & 2 are pretty much what I am still working on.

Point 1 – the only way to truly eliminate the hesitation is to approach quickly, the old 3 ( or 5 or 7 second ) rule…which of course leads directly into the question of what you’re going to open with…..since speed is the key , the openers have to be ready or something very obvious ( if we’re going situational/observational) ….
More than anything, I believe killing the hesitation makes everything a lot easier….

Point 2 – Staying in longer – yea, I still eject quickly sometimes, even when its quite obvious I could push the interaction further….Nothing but discipline is going to work here I guess

Those, and improving my text game a bit are the main things I am working on….

[Author]

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