Reply To: Relationship lull

[The_Hurricane]

Well, wouldn’t be the first time we gave the wrong advice. There’s a lot of noise in this stuff and we’re not there ourselves to see what’s going on. That having been said, you have to make sure that you’re not deluding yourself. We’ve seen a lot more of that on this site than we have of the kind of special situation that you’re describing. Many men will tell us that the general advice doesn’t apply to them and then log in six months or a year later to say they learned their lesson the hard way. We certainly hope you’re not in that group. Still, there are parts of your description of what’s wrong that don’t make sense to me. She wants to marry you. She wants a long term relationship. She’s really into you. You’re the dominant one. All of that should mean great sex! The fact that you’re experiencing something else and the fact that you are clearly uncomfortable thinking about ways of pulling back say to me that the problem may be more in line with the assumptions Eric and I made. Again, no guarantees. We are not there to see it ourselves, but the pattern you’re describing is pretty common. Look hard at the mirror and try to figure out whether you’re being honest with yourself.

–Lee