Reply To: Being more flirty

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I find that men who improvise are typically much less flirty than men who think ahead of time about what they’re going to say. Just because something is practiced doesn’t mean that it’s fake. All of the people I know who are good with strangers – public speakers, presenters, managers, sales people, and, yes, pickup artists – figure out what works for them and keep using the same stories over and over again, modifying only the parts of the conversation that serve as connective tissue. It’s hard to tell you in a few words what you should say during an approach because that is a very personal thing. When I coach, I typically spend a few hours tailoring an opener to a particular student and that requires a lot of back and forth. If you want an example, look up the “Deep Thoughts” opener on this site. When your deep thoughts story is as tight as my deep thoughts story, a much smaller fraction of women will wander away during your approach. You can’t get flirty until your openers start to stick. By definition, being flirty is saying something slightly inappropriate and if you’re losing them after a few lines, you are not yet getting them to the point where they are ready for you to be a little inappropriate. So that’s where I would focus for now, your opener.