Reply To: The Mindset

[ryano]

for me the experience was like this:

year1: doing a ton of indirect. “do you know how to get to…?” type of questions. hardly got me anywhere due to issues with transitioning and having many girls look at me like “wtf do you want from me, i just answered your question”. eventually i got good with transitioning, but my motivation wasn’t there alot of the time. like after work the last thing i wanted to do was trick girls with stupid questions about how to get somewhere, it just started getting boring to me. that’s when i started looking into direct in a more serious way..

year2: doing a ton of direct. vanilla direct like. “hey, just wanted to say i thought you looked cute/nice/etc”. got me tons of dates and results.

year3: doing what i call, whatever the hell i want as long as i’m flirting. sometimes indirect. sometimes direct. but my intent and flirting is always there. so even with indirect i’d open with “hey do you know how to cook pasta?” followed by “great i’m looking for a chef, can we make that happen sometime?”.

now, if i had to pick it’d probably be just going direct. girls need to know that you’re not hiding behind your intent. alot of guys i’ve coached i specifically told them not to hide behind their intent bc of all the time wasted i had on year1. also it keeps you from approaching hot girls bc you keep thinking “what should i say?” etc. while i like eric and his teachings it just wasn’t as effective for me due to the lack of intent. and now i know that girls just want you to be crystal clear or you risk wasting time. now that i’m advanced i could probably make indirect work because i know how to flirt. but when i was a beginner? forget about it. i creeped so many girls out with indirect. indirect is probably alot “creepier” than direct is because you’re inherently hiding behind a mask.. so u need to be advanced to pull it off right.