Reply To: pushing for sex
I’d say you did the right thing. You could probably have pushed further, but with a girl who is dealing with serious trauma, would you want to?
A little while back, I met this girl and invited her to a nightclub I was going to with friends. She got there pretty late, and an hour later I was tired and ready to go home. I felt a bit guilty about leaving, but I invited her to come and ‘hang out with me’ at my place.
I barely knew this girl but she agreed to come, so I knew it was on. When we got back to my place, she was very defensive, even saying ‘don’t touch me’ a couple of times! However, I knew she was there for a reason, so I kept pushing. It took all my determination and escalation skills, but we eventually had sex.
I ended up seeing her again a couple of times, and I bought up how closed off she was that night. She said “yeah, I totally wanted to have sex with you, why else would I have been there?”
So my instincts were correct. But y’know what? It wasn’t enjoyable! I’m never doing that again. I don’t wanna feel like I’m half-raping a girl; it’s an experience not worth having. Better to fuck the girls who are gonna give you the same passion back – that’s when it’s fun.