Reply To: "Deep thoughts" opener

[The_Hurricane]

@SomeGuyUK,

You shouldn’t ask them what they’re thinking about. You’re not there yet. It’s too open ended and you haven’t offered anything that would make them jump through that hoop. The model is lead, then ask them to follow, not the other way around. You’re asking them to lead. Like Mr. Antiquity says, it’s too interview-y.

Tell her she’s thinking deep thoughts. Say it like you’re not expecting anything from her. It’s just an observation, one that amuses you. She’ll respond or laugh or whatever, at which point, you continue with the rest of your story. “You know I recently read this article that said…”

I would recommend not thinking about an actual article when you say this. It might help you right now, but it’s a crutch to want hard facts to back up your flirty conversations. You should say these things like a factoid you vaguely remember. Whether it’s absolutely correct is irrelevant. That having been said, if you absolutely need a factual article to start talking to women, there are many articles on how much of our day we spend daydreaming. Here is one from the New York Times:

http://www.nytimes.com/1987/12/15/science/for-some-people-half-of-day-is-spent-in-fantasy.html

There are many. Daydreaming is a well studied subject.

As you progress, you can say vary the opener a little bit. For example, when I ask if she’s thinking deep thoughts and she says she’s not, I often say “So you have no story for me?” She laughs or sometimes asks if I have a story for her. In either case, I just continue.

–Lee