Reply To: Randomness? Or bad statistics?

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“p.p.s Paul was in Austin when he filmed that video mainly because the rules in Austin are more lax in regards to recording laws.”

Really? And did he wind up checking out that piercing place she recommended? Or take her advice as to where to go for music that night? Do you see what I mean, dude? There’s nothing particularly genuine about it.

What I do is genuine. I tell real stories based on my real life experiences. These stories help girls open up about their thoughts and experiences. I ask tough questions, questions that help me understand girls while at the same time revealing what is important to me.

My stories and questions put girls on notice that they’re not getting a free ride based entirely on their looks. Beyond looks and confidence, that’s what those studies show makes men more attractive to women, the idea that they’re still making up their minds about whether they like the woman standing in front of them. The quicker you make up your mind and the less information you have by the time you do it, the less attractive you will be to the women you approach.

What I talk about is real. Nothing is made up. It’s stuff that’s not going to be less important to me on approach number 10,000 than it was on approach number 100. If the stories don’t change and my preferences don’t change – at least not in the short term – why should I have to say it differently every time? Just to maintain the illusion of spontaneity? That would be the biggest lie of all.

One last point. Here’s the way compliments work. When you compliment a woman, you get points for balls, especially on the approach. Obviously, that’s a positive. If you continue to compliment her without expressing your own specific preferences for what you want – a smart girl, a reader, a creative girl, etc. – you start to lose points. If, by the end of the interaction, all you’ve done is told her how amazing she is and haven’t convinced her that you have standards she has yet to meet, you better be damn good looking or have some other source of status or power because, otherwise, your value will go to zero.

What those studies show is that there is a sweet spot, an area in between where she knows you’re kinda interested but not completely sold. The article calls it “delicious uncertainty”. It’s not only the most attractive strategy for a man but also the correct way for a high value man to behave. It takes months to really get to know someone, so high value men – men who have lots of romantic options – are not going to make up their minds so quickly. Only men who have few romantic options are going to give a woman immediate certainty. Women know that and find such men less attractive.