Approach Forum » Approach Anxiety

1. stev111
   Member

   I have had sometime off approaching but one recent approach I did to a hot girl at a train station prompted me to go out and start approaching again...I know I don't have approach anxiety (or at least no where near the scale I had in my early days) but I feel I must approach...is that ok...does it mean I still have aa if I feel I need to approach??

   But what annoys me is the fact that I haven't had many opportunities and I would like a relationship...a golden rule I have lived by is to never get dates via the internet because I feel it is creepy yet there are many guys out there who manage to get it with girls I'm like "why do you girls like going out with internet guys??"
   Anyways, should I just stick to trying to find girls outside my house and get dates or should I try the internet thing??

   stephen

   p.s. eric, it would be great if set up your own pua facebook like others have done because I think you are one of the best out there. Or least for this website so you get more publicity.

   Posted 1 month ago

2. ramakandra
   Member

   Your opinions on the internet thing is iffy at best - the internet has put plenty of people in touch and into relationships. There are dating sites and meetup type organizations that work to help anyone as long as they are willing to try that. A few years ago maybe the internet was considerably less popular for meeting potential dates but I have to say, lots of folks I know personally have incredible success and date frequently with interesting people they met on dating sites.

   Sites like jdate for Jewish singles is the idea. The blanket 'dating site' may not be the best way to go. I feel those are what make people think twice about putting up a profile. Instead it would be easier to join meetup and find a club or activity you like and join that network. Same goes with ethnicity or religion. Its almost crazy to me why someone would not use this resource alongside the old fashioned route. The internet obviously has creepy people on it, but your limiting your own ability to meet new people, and making it difficult for others to try and meet you. Lots of us have taken a look and although it is not the romanticized 'pickup' or approach - it can work and lead to great things.

   Don't mistake the internet with being easy or faster. Its unlikely you will meet people without paying a little money, or spending a little time and effort filtering through profiles. Much of it isn't that great but you can find some gems if you are willing to try.

   Posted 1 month ago

3. Eric Disco
   Host

   Hey Stephen, nice to see you back here.

   Internet dating isn't creepy. You can meet some great women on there. I would say it's a good supplement to meeting women in person. You might also want to think about speed dating. That's a fun way to meet women also.

   The drawbacks of internet dating are that it can be a huge timesuck. And if you have approach anxiety, it can also distract you from actually approaching in that you use it as a crutch for meeting women, an excuse to feel like you don't need to approach. If you're not already approaching women consistently now, I would focus on that rather than doing internet dating.

   Eric

   Posted 1 month ago

4. stev111
   Member

   Cheers Eric,

   yeah, I'd choose approaching over interent anytime it's just that there are a lot of people I know who have relationships via the net yet don't have the skills or confidence socially like I do. Pisses me off a bit.

   There's this girl who seems to add guys to her facebook and I noticed recently she had a date from one of them...she's a girl who hangs out with me and my friends but I don't know whether to set up a date online (I'm not too sure about online gaming) or just wait it out until next time we meet which by then she could already have a relationship. Could you suggest something here Eric?

   Cheers

   Posted 1 month ago

5. Eric Disco
   Host

   Hey Stephen,

   You can do it over facebook but in general you're better asking her out in person. If you felt there was already enough chemistry the last time you hung out, then facebook is fine. If not, wait till you see her in person and strike up some more chemistry first.

   But try not to make it a date. Suggest meeting up for a drink and give a reason: you're going to be in her neighborhood, there's a bar she might like, etc.

   Eric

   Posted 1 month ago

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