The audio from the webinar is now free to download or listen online.

In the second half of the webinar, we opened up the floor to questions from you guys.

You get to hear both Cory and I answer:

• How can guys in their 30′s and 40′s date women in their early 20′s?
• What advice do you have for young guys who want older women?
• How do you deal with the differences in women in different countries?
• What do you do if you feel yourself becoming combative with women?
• Is it good to show your intentions directly in the first place or should you go slowly?
• How do you find the energy to push yourself to take initiative?
• How do you overcome the shyness when there’s a lot of people around?
• How do you overcome insecurities about your appearance?

Download the podcast here or listen below

Dont forget to visit CorySkyy.com for some great info and a chance to be part of his new killer program.

They turn into the guy who’s constantly asking a girl out for a date and she’s constantly saying no.

They get into relationships where the girl is acting badly but he’s powerless to stop her bad behavior.

Part of the problem here is that men tend to be straightforward. They take her words at face value.

They don’t understanding the difference between implicit and explicit communication.

You go out on a date with a girl. The next day, you send her a text. But she’s already decided she’s not into you.

Explicit communication would be if she texted you back something like, “I don’t think we’re a match,” or “I’m getting a friendship vibe from you.” She explicitly told you how she feels.

Implicit communication would be if she simply didn’t text you back at all. She is communicating to you that she’s not interested but she’s not explicitly telling you she isn’t interested.

Explicit communicate is typically verbal and straightforward where as with implicit communication she’s sending a message based on action rather than the surface meaning of the words.

When I wasn’t so skilled socially, I had a hard time with implicit communication. It bothered me that people didn’t explicitly communicate because I had trouble reading that communication.

In situations like these, I would often continue to invest in the girl even though she wasn’t interested. I wasn’t a stalker but it I didn’t know when enough was enough.

It upset me that people couldn’t simply tell the truth and be up front when they were or weren’t interested.

The Key to Staying Empowered in Relationships

Once you start to get into relationships, implicit versus explicit communication becomes even more important. Much of modern dating advice goes astray over and over in the same exact way.

Your partner does something inappropriate, something bad happens, or some other issue comes up and the first word of advice is always: Have a talk about it. This is explicit communication.

If there is a sitcom-style misunderstanding in the relationship, having a talk can work. But typically explicit communication doesn’t solve anything. In fact it only serves to make the problem worse.

Let’s say you’re dating a girl. You’re unhappy because she’s flirting with other guys while out on dates with you. If you chose the route of explicit communication, you would have a ‘talk’ with her about flirting with other guys in front of you.

The problem here is that as you are explicitly communicating with her about what you like and don’t like, you are implicitly communicating something very different.

You are communicating to her that when she does something disrespectful, you open up more communication with her. You share your feelings and become more vulnerable. You add to your disempowerment by opening up and sharing your feelings with her.

Alternatively, you can use implicit communication to communicate with her.

When she’s acting inappropriate, you pull away. You take your attention away from her for a period of time.

You may even cut the date short, as a signal to her that her actions are inappropriate.

Implicit communication tends to be more powerful than explicit communication because you’re taking action. You’re showing her that you will walk away if her bad behavior continues.

She sees that she’s losing you and has to make a change if she is going to continue to be with you.

Implicit Communication is the Most Honest

While implicit communication seems complicated, once you start to look at what’s going on underneath, it’s really quite simple.

Almost all implicit communication in relationships is binary–either a Yes or No. You’re either rewarding her for doing good or pushing her away for doing bad.

Implicit communication starts with the idea that you’re the prize, that you’re valuable in the relationship and if she wants more, she needs to act appropriately.

Once you learn the difference between implicit and explicit communication, you can start to read between the lines and see what’s really going on in your relationships with women. You start to realize that people’s words are fairly worthless and you listen to their actions instead.

That’s really the only true honest signal you get from people.

A girl at a bar walks by and says to you, “That’s the ugliest shirt I’ve ever seen in my life. Terrible.” The explicit communication is that she doesn’t like something about you.

But the implicit communication is that she likes you because she would not have started talking with you in the first place if she didn’t like you. She’s flirting–perhaps badly–but she’s interested in conversation.

Likewise, you may text a girl and she’s very responsive. She’s friendly and fun and totally up for chatting. But every time you invite her to meet up, she’s busy.

Explicitly, she’s saying Yes. She’s friendly and positive.

But implicitly, she’s saying No because she won’t hang out with you. Until she acts otherwise, you need to proceed like it’s a No or else you will invest too much time and energy into a lost cause.

Watch her actions, not her words.

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Get my award-winning program, She’s Six Steps Away, now at half off for a limited time!

http://shessixstepsaway.com

Why does good intimacy not guarantee good sex, contrary to popular belief?

Can we want what we already have?

Why is the forbidden so erotic?

What is it about transgression that makes desire so potent?

For the answer, check out this excellent TED Talk by Esther Perel, the author of Mating in Captivity.

They spend an inordinate amount of time demonstrating that they are an appropriate match for her.

For a woman to get involved with you, she must, at some point, take action, even if that means simply responding `yes’ to your initiatives.

That initiative is always based on her feelings.

The decision to not date you may be a logical one or an emotional one.

For example, if she’s experienced, she may deduce that her feelings are being manipulated and she may decide that she does not want to date you.

Or she may not feel emotionally inclined to date you.

But no matter how logical she is, her taking a positive step to get involved with you will always be based on emotion. You may be the perfect match on paper, but if you don’t turn her on emotionally, she won’t say Yes.

Why?

Ultimately, she knows that feelings are all that remain in a relationship.

No matter how good or appropriate the proposition, if you don’t feel it right at the beginning, you will never feel it. She can envision feeling less, but she can’t envision feeling more.

If there is no critical mass, it won’t happen, no matter how much she logically thinks you may be a good fit for her.

Her feelings are like riding a horse. If she senses that horse has a broken leg, she knows that continuing to ride it will not heal that leg. If her emotions about you are insufficient, they are unlikely to just develop.

Conversely, if her feelings for you are like a bucking bronco, no matter how unruly they are, she can envision those feelings being tamed.

This is because that’s always the direction that emotions in relationships move: from unruly to tame. At first, emotions are unruly. Then they become tame.

The biggest shift in thinking for guys improving with women is to start to focus on emotion rather than logically convincing her that you’re a good match for her. Instead of targeting her brain, you target her disposition.

So How Do We Focus on Emotion with Women?

You must focus on her emotions in two separate stages: the attraction stage and the connection stage.

The attraction stage comes first. When you meet, you must come across as a challenge to her.

There must be some part of her that wonders whether she can have you or whether she’s good enough to get you. You can do this in a lot of ways.

But mostly, in some small way, you are showing her that you are willing to lose her. You are doing small things that indicate to her you are willing to jeopardize the burgeoning `relationship.’

• You take risks and act flip
• You joke with her or tease her
• You disagree with her
• You act skeptical of her as a suitor
• You demonstrate that you don’t consider yourself a suitor

If you’ve ever met a woman whom you were genuinely ambivalent about, you probably demonstrated the above `naturally.’

The next stage is the connection stage. Once she’s attracted, you can move on to connection.

You do this by getting her to reveal her emotions to you-not her emotions for you, just her feelings about things in general.

In order to get her to reveal her emotions, you must first get personal with her. Find out personal things.

But personal is not the same thing as emotional. “I grew up in Florida,” is not the same thing as “I miss my parents in Florida.”

In order to get her to reveal her feelings, you first ask her personal questions, “Where are you from? Is your family still there?” and then you ask her emotional questions about those personal facts. “How do you feel about that? Do you miss your family?”

Going back and forth between Attraction and Connection

The attraction stage comes before the connection stage. But you will continue to go back and forth between these two stages.

Once you’ve connected a bit, you will go back to attraction. And then back to connection.

Once you’ve gotten emotional, you’ll gently pull back and challenge her a bit again. And then once again, you’ll both concede and connect again.

In a sense, the interaction is like an emotional roller-coaster ride. It starts off at the top, shallow and fun and challenging. Then goes down and gets really deep and meaningful. Then it comes back up to shallow and fun and challenging. And then back down to meaningful.

In this way, you keep her emotions involved.

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Learn how to get past your approach anxiety the most effective way possible. Check out the award-winning program She’s Six Steps Away.

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Listened to 14 years worth of complaints about bad boyfriends, your bad day and everything else that’s wrong with you.

Have helped hundreds, possibly thousands of people just by listening and trying to cheer them up. The first person I ever helped said she stopped cutting herself because she had me. Another person told me she’d never, ever say “I love you” to anyone again the day she met me, later she said it to me. So I kept on helping. “I’m not looking for wealth or glory, I’m just buying that stairway to heaven Jesus sang about.”

Lots of heart, kindness, caring. To this point it’s been thrown away by jerks. So lots of hurt too. It’s not possible for me to have been any nicer to people than I have but no good deed goes unpunished and all that.

Still believe in chivalry.

I spend a lot of time thinking about Why girls have such incredibly bad taste in guys. “He locked her in a box for months on end and called her ugly and gay”…yah…and /’m the one that can’t find a gf!?!?

You want someone that’s sweet, kind, caring, wants you for you and nothing else after all the complaining how you can’t eeevvveeerrr find someone like that and it would make you s00000000 happy to have such a guy…and then throw him away when you get it.

You should message me if you are sweet and caring. Not just one of those people that say you are then act like a total ass when it’s time to show it.

Sex thing, not a chance. Nil. Ziltch. Nadda. Zero. Not only has every girl I dated that already had sex cheated on me I’ve promised someone that if I ever changed my mind on it she’d be the first I ask. It’s been a very long time and she once told me I was the prince charming she dreamed of when she was a little girl so I would NOT do that to her. I wouldn’t do it to anyone really. If I would I’d be a terrible person and you wouldn’t want me anymore. But the point is were I to change it I’d have to ask her and she’d still say yes.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to be my girlfriend.

What makes me cringe is that this guy is an extreme version of the way I used to be back in the day.

When you adopt a self-righteous demeanor like this, you can blame everyone but yourself when things don’t go your way.

If you always play the angel, you never have to go through the pain of stepping outside of your comfort zone and doing things that scare you.

The scary part is that you can stay a momma’s boy like this all your life if you don’t figure out how to change.

And you’ll think there’s something wrong with the world instead of yourself until your dying day.

Get ready for some killer insight into the minds of some seasoned relationship experts who have been in the game for a while.

Some of the stuff we cover

• What to do and say when a girl gets flakey
• How to maintain casual relationships without lying to anyone involved
• Maintaining long-distance relationships and relationships while traveling
• How to go from a casual to a serious relationship
• How to maintain serious relationships and get what you want
• The pros and cons of serious relationships and monogamy

Download the podcast here or listen below

This post is from Hurricane Lee.

You can approach girls. You can ask for the time. You can ask for directions.

You can ask a few related follow-up questions

But you can’t transition into a personal conversation.

Sounds familiar?

You are not alone. Everyone starting out in game has the same problem.

Everyone.

Why?

Because it reveals the most fundamental fear of all: the fear of judgment.

That is what’s going on in your head. You are afraid of being judged inadequate.

While you are asking for the ordinary, no one is judging you. But when you transition to reveal your interest, you are being judged by the girl you approached.

There is no way to stop this from happening. You have to get used to it happening.

The solution to this problem is to make the next step very, very small. Instead of diving right into a personal conversation, stretch that process out into two or three additional steps. Get used to each step individually before moving on.

Recently, I had success giving the following advice to a coaching student.

After directions, make an innocuous comment. I like:

“Thanks for the help. This is a very friendly city.”

Now, repeat that again and again until you are making that comment each and every time you’ve been given directions.

After the comment, no matter how friendly a reaction you get, walk away.

Next, extend the comment by adding a question:

“Thanks for the help. This is a very friendly city. (Small pause.) Do you agree?”

Wait for her to agree or disagree, but no matter what she says, smile and walk away.

Do it again and again and again until you’re comfortable.

When you’re ready, add more:

“Thanks for the help. This is a very friendly city. (Small pause.) Do you agree?”

(Allow her to respond.)

Then add:

“You know I have this friend. When he sees people on the street or on a subway eating, he will ask them ‘Can I have the last bite?’ You know what’s amazing? No one says no. People are a lot nicer than we tend to give them credit for.”

Again, get used to this step by repeating it again and again and leaving when you are finished.

Finally, when you are really ready, the next step to a personal conversation is easy.

Why?

Because you’re already chatting about the city and how friendly everyone is.

There are several ways you can go, but the easiest is: “Where are you from? Are you a native of my beautiful city?”

That’s it. You are now in a personal conversation. And you’ve gotten there without making any big leaps.

- Hurricane Lee

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Learn how to meet women the easy way, starting from scratch. The new program, She’s Six Steps Away, teaches you everything you need to know to get past your fear of approaching women.