This post is from Hurricane Lee.

You can approach girls. You can ask for the time. You can ask for directions.

You can ask a few related follow-up questions

But you can’t transition into a personal conversation.

Sounds familiar?

You are not alone. Everyone starting out in game has the same problem.

Everyone.

Why?

Because it reveals the most fundamental fear of all: the fear of judgment.

That is what’s going on in your head. You are afraid of being judged inadequate. Read the rest of this entry »

At some point, you realize that what you’re doing just isn’t working.

You’re too tame, too friendly, too passive, and too nice. Too many opportunities are slipping through your fingers because you aren’t making the move.

So you learn new strategies that are edgier, bolder, and more sexual. You start to take risks with attractive women.

You start to get better results. Women respond to your new boldness. Things are looking up.

But then it happens: You meet a girl you really like. And everything seems different now.

Even though she’s not getting sexual with you, for some reason you decide it’s okay to be a lot nicer and take things a lot slower sexually with her.

Your brain comes up with brilliant reasons why it should be okay for you to do this:

• I want a wholesome, quality girl rather than a trashy girl. A quality girl will make a guy take it slow before she hooks up with him.

• I want true love and a relationship instead of just sex. True love means that even though she isn’t into me yet, I keep making an effort until I win her over. Read the rest of this entry »

One of the most commonly discussed concepts in dating is not being ‘outcome dependent.’

The idea is that during interactions with women you shouldn’t be too focused on getting a specific result. That result could be:

• getting a good reaction from her
• getting a phone number
• getting a date
• having sex
• getting into a relationship

The idea is that women can sense when you have an agenda. Instead, you should try to enjoy the moment for what it is and not care so much about what she thinks or does.

This mindset allows you to be more spontaneous and more fun around women. You can take more risks, take initiative to be more sexual, and just be “yourself.” In the end, this ends up getting better results with women anyway.

Being less dependent on outcomes is one of the most important principles of getting better with women-if not the most important. It’s good that people are talking about it.

The problem I see is how people recommend you stop being outcome dependent. Read the rest of this entry »

Most men walk around insecure about their looks.

They feel bad that they can’t attract certain women because they themselves aren’t physically attractive enough.

They walk around with a feeling that attraction for women works the same way it does for men.

Most men haven’t had enough experience initiating interactions with women they don’t know.

Because of this, they can only mirror their own attraction mechanism–which is highly based on visual input-and project that onto women.

They feel that women are just like men, except that they have different bodies (female bodies) and are attracted to different bodies (male bodies).

Read the rest of this entry »

Is there something wrong with me because I experience approach anxiety?

This is one of the biggest questions guys ask.

The paralysis of approach anxiety can feel like a disease, as if you have a mental illness for experiencing it.

I could tell you that most guys experience some type of fear when trying to initiate interactions with women.

Talk to any random guy and ask him how he would feel walking across a bar and starting a conversation with a woman.

Most will say that they can’t do it or have a lot of trouble doing it.

But the one big wrench in the idea that approach anxiety is normal is that there are guys who do not experience it.

Read the rest of this entry »

What does flossing have to do with meeting women?

Everything.

And nothing.

Let me explain.

I like to floss in the shower. I’m weird like that.

I get into the shower, I floss and I move onto the next step.

The other day, I was feeling really lazy and decided to skip a day.

Bad bad bad.

Skipping a day flossing is not the worst thing in the world. But what it does is hugely problematic.

Read the rest of this entry »

I step onto the subway train. It’s crowded. It’s been a long day.

I’m tired. I’m not in the mood for much. Sorta just feel like going home.

But then I see her. She’s cute as a button.

I make my way over to her. And then, I touch her on the arm as I say, “Hey.”

We talk a bit. And laugh a bit.

She has to get off the train too soon, so it doesn’t end up going anywhere.

But after this, I feel better. I start to feel like I have MORE energy. I’m ready to socialize even more.

It’s an amazing feeling to know that you can approach any woman anywhere. That the dread of anxiety won’t turn you into a zombie every time you open your mouth.

If you’ve been reading my blog for a long time, you know that I used to have a ton of approach anxiety. Read the rest of this entry »

I do not hesitate to say Lance Mason from Pickup101 is amazing with women.

But even more than that, Lance is one of the best teachers I know.

I worked under his tutelage for years.

The foundation for a lot of things I do now comes from Lance’s instruction.

But Lance wasn’t always great with women.

Even heroes have a beginning…

In a conversation a while back, Lance talked to me about his original motivation to get past his fear of meeting women.

He also talks about the very first time he approached a woman. Read the rest of this entry »