Read the rest of this entry »

Guys waste a lot of time looking for two magic bullets:

1. Something that will consistently make them feel better

2. Something that will consistently make women feel better about them

Searching for these magic bullets will lead to a lot of heartache and pain.

Trying to feel better

Feeling good is huge. It’s one of the most important things in life.

If you’re depressed or unhappy, what’s the point of living?

The thing is, everyone goes through a range of feelings no matter who we are. We all feel happy, sad, fearful, frustrated, joyful, etc.

Anyone who claims they don’t is lying to you.

The same is true around women.

Read the rest of this entry »

One of my former clients talks about his approach anxiety:

“I’d been reading about how to do it for a while.

Finally one night I said to myself, all right, I’m going to go out tonight and I’m going to try to talk to girls.

I went out to this bar in my neighborhood. It was a Thursday night. A band was playing.

It was somewhat empty, maybe thirty people in the place.

I walked in and walked to the back to get a beer. That’s when I spotted this group of girls.

There were three of them, the only single women in the place.

My goal was just to open a conversation. Read the rest of this entry »

The Ballad of the Nice Guy (via Reddit)

I’m walking along the subway platform on my daily outing.

I stop next to a girl.

As I turn to her and ask her a question, I realize how cute she is, much cuter than I initially thought.

“Does this go to 59th Street?” I ask her. I’m just warming up, asking different women basic questions.

“I think so…” she says with hesitation. “I think you want to take the F… ”

“You don’t sound so sure…” I say. She starts laughing. Girls love it when you point something out about them.

“I know it goes to 57th,” she says smiling. I can see her thinking about it.

A train pulls into the station on front of us. Read the rest of this entry »

You want to be natural. We all do.

Your interactions with women shouldn’t feel forced or fake.

You want to be yourself.

Confidence is being able to express yourself in almost any situation.

But as you’re improving with women, the main problem:

That ‘self’ gets locked up inside.

And getting it out ain’t easy.

One of the best things I ever did for myself is to start consistently using the same opener in every situation possible.

Here are eight excellent reasons to start doing this.

Read the rest of this entry »

Thirty years ago, Dr. Stanley Milgram requested his graduate students perform an experiment.

They were to go down into the subways of New York City and, over and over, ask people if they could have their seat.

“Excuse me, may I have your seat?”

Originally, the experiment was conducted to see just how many people would give up their seats. Surprisingly, two thirds did.

But the more interesting part about this experiment is the trepidation the students experienced trying to carry out this task.

Those of you who have had trouble breaching the invisible barrier between you and that attractive stranger on the street will relate to their experiences.

The seemingly simple assignment proved to be extremely difficult, even traumatic, for the students to carry out. Read the rest of this entry »

A former mentoring student of mine sent me an e-mail this week.

Hi Eric,

I seduced a hot girl that I briefly worked with.

After I hook up with a girl, I usually ask her for her views on sex and seduction.So I asked this girl how she likes to meet men.

She said she hates meeting men at bars or clubs.She told me her favorite way to meet guys is at Union Square*!

She said if she is ever in the mood to be picked up she will go hang out at Union Square and wait for a cool guy to approach her!

I also asked how they open her. She said she hates when they compliment her right away.She said she loves the “smooth” guys that open indirectly and then seduce her through conversation.

So interesting that this is your favorite game spot and that you prefer indirect. Thought you would find this interesting.

*”Union Square” refers to a park in the middle of Manhattan that’s surrounded by bookstores, supermarkets and clothing stores.

Aaaah. It warms my heart.

The takeaway from all of this is not that all women necessarily respond better to an indirect approach, or that all women prefer to meet guys during the day rather than in bars.

The takeaway here is that women want guys to talk to them.

It seems women are always providing resistance to us in some way. Even when a girl likes you, she will “test” your meddle by offering resistance. It’s in her nature.

Due to this, it’s easy to start viewing women as an obstacle rather than realizing that they want to meet a great guy.

Seduction is a collaborative process.

Next time you go to talk to a woman, remember this. She may have set out that day looking to meet a great guy.

And guess what? You are that great guy.

I quit going to the gym.

Why? Is it because I’m lazy?

Nope. I’m driven as hell.

Is it because I don’t want to get huge and muscular?

Nope. I’d love to have a killer physique.

It’s for one reason: Time.

Every morning, I get up and I workout for about 20 minutes before breakfast. Sure, if I spent an hour or two at the gym every day, I would get bigger a lot faster.

But I know something about myself.

I know, that if I set myself up to do an hour a day, I won’t do it!

I may be able to keep it up for a week or two or three. But then something will happen.

I’ll get busy with my coaching sessions. Or I’ll get up extra early to finish editing my upcoming book. Or I’ll go on vacation.

And I’ll stop working out. Read the rest of this entry »

I don’t like when women fight over me.

I’m not enticed by the prospect of a two-woman bar brawl ignited over the possibility of going home with me.

Can’t we all just get along?

I scan the uptown restaurant/bar, looking for my friend Mike.

I haven’t seen Mike in a while, so it will be nice to catch up with him.

I spot him sitting alone at the bar. Three seats away from him is a cute girl.

“What’s up, man,” I say to him as I get to the bar.

We talk for a moment and agree to get some dinner sitting at the bar. I turn to the cute girl, now one seat separating us, and ask her, “How’s the food here?”

She tries to answer but her mouth is full, so she half mumbles, half laughs and gives a thumbs up. Read the rest of this entry »