No matter how good you get, you will always feel a bit of intimidation when talking with the women you like most. You may have dated a hundred women, but what happens with the next woman is always an unknown.
What Tyson says about fear is spot on. It gets at the heart of dealing with fear and anxiety: it’s a paradox. Read the rest of this entry »
“Smile!” Eric Weber admonished to the audience on the tape.
It was the late 90′s.
I was driving along the New Jersey Turnpike in my Plymouth Reliant listening to dating guru Eric Weber’s popular tape How to Talk to Girls.
“When you don’t smile,” said Eric Weber, “women will think, ‘What can I do to please him!’ But when you do smile, she feels more comfortable.”
It didn’t totally make sense to me. Don’t you want women to wonder what they can do to please you?
This was part and parcel to the confusing tutelage and conflicting messages I experienced when trying to learn to meet women back in those days.
As I drove along the Turnpike, I sucked in all the knowledge I could from Eric Weber. This was the fifth time I had listened to the tape. I was on my way to meet up with my friend and bandmate Ken.
You’re walking on the sidewalk, a little to the right as you normally do. It’s crowded with people to your left and right walking in both directions.
In front of you, walking in your direction toward you is a gorgeous woman. If both of you keep walking in the same direction, you’ll walk into each other.
What do you do? Do you move out of her way?
Most people do not consciously think about it. But if you live in a city like New York, it happens to you at least 50 times a day: Someone ends up walking directly toward you in your path.
It may not seem like such a big deal what happens next, but what you do is indicative of how you perceive your place in the world.
To change your direction in order to stay out of other people’s way communicates that you don’t have a right to be here, or in the very least, that you think other people have more of a right to walk on the sidewalk than you do.
It still happens to me about twenty times a day: I’ll go to put my hands in my pockets.
And I have to stop myself.
I’ve got these long, dangling appendages–called arms–coming out of the sides of my torso.
At the end of each of these “arms” are these awkward proturbences called “hands.”
They don’t know whether to be tense or loose. It feels weird to just have them hang there.
I want to stick them in my pockets or loop them around my belt buckles.
But every time I go to do that, I think of a video I saw of two mixed martial arts fighters who stare each other down.
One fighter, because he has his hands looped into his pockets, looks so much less confident than the other fighter. Can you guess which fighter ended up getting his ass kicked? Read the rest of this entry »
I really like this video because it shows exactly what happens on a date when a tall, good-looking, pro athlete tries to get away with being too nice.
I’m warning you, it’s painful to watch. But there is so much juicy stuff in here, I couldn’t help break down exactly what went wrong.
0:59 He walks in and taps her on the shoulder. “Excuse me,” he says. This is something you say to a stranger. Instead, say “Hey” or “Hi.”
From then on, his body language is TERRIBLE. He can’t stand still.? He’s pacing back and forth the whole time. Notice him do this whenever he’s standing throughout the video.
She’s into me, I can tell. It’s sexual as hell and we’ve been connecting like crazy.
But something is off now.
It’s her body language.
Her arms are folded and she’s turned away. Her legs are crossed but in the opposite direction, away from me.
Whenever a girl does this, it’s imperative what you do next.
Call her out on it.
“Man, you have such closed body language,” I say to her as I mimic with my body exactly what she’s doing.
“Sorry!!!” she says. Immediately she turns and faces me 100%. Her knees are practically pointing toward me out from under the short skirt she’s wearing.
She stares into my eyes with puppy dog eyes.
If you let something like bad body language go on too long, she’ll convince herself emotionally that she’s not into you.
However, if you call it out, it’s a show of dominance and social perceptiveness.
The Bunker Buster: How We Wing
by 
Eric Disco
Me and my wing, Lee, have spent a long time going out together meeting women.
5 Comments »
She’s into me, I can tell. It’s sexual as hell and we’ve been connecting like crazy.