We all know that more than 75% of our communication is body language.
For example, the more you face her, the more you’re telling her “I’m interested.”
The more your body tenses up when you go to talk to this very attractive girl, the more you’re telling her “I’m not comfortable with talking to girls as attractive as you.”
Logically it follows that what you do is more important than what you say.
There are a lot of decisions to be made when you are out with a girl.
Do you take a cab to your location or the subway? Where do you eat? Do you leave right after dinner or do you stay and have another drink? What drinks do you choose? Where do you sit when you walk into a place?
The most important dating tip to remember is that IT DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER.
None of this shit matters at all.
What matters is that you LEAD. Sure, if she’s uncomfortable or doesn’t like something she’ll tell you. Or she may not. Or she may be full of shit and just be testing you to see if you keep leading. It gets confusing sorting everything out, but KEEP LEADING.
First and foremost, you want to physically lead. At every stage of the game you are going to lead. You started this and you are going to keep leading.
You took the lead by walking up to her and talking to her.
You set the tone by bantering and having fun with her.
You showed how comfortable you are with her when you gently touched her on the arm.
You decided to make yourself vulnerable and went into deep rapport.
You took initiative and sexually escalated in a way that turned her on.
You are leading her there. Don’t make the mistake of saying you are going to do something and hope she takes the lead. This is a common mistake.
Talking about leading without leading is actually worse than not even talking about it.
If you are sitting there eating with her and both of you are done eating, instead of just saying “Do you want to get out of here,” you should be standing up, leading her.
If you just say the words and wait, without physically leading, you are asking her to take the lead. Want a way to kill attraction fast? This is it!
Be ready to physically take the lead at all times and at all points in the interaction.
You should be the one to end dates.
You should be the one to end phone conversations.
You should be the one to kick her out at the end of the night or in the morning.
How do you physically lead when she says she needs to go?
She’s over your place. She says she can’t sleep over and that she needs to get going. You ignore what she says and pull her back into bed. Get her worked up. And then YOU be the one to say “Okay, enough” and pull her up by the hand and say “I’m kicking your ass out.”
You’re on the phone with her. She says she needs to go. You pull out one more bit of interesting conversation. Then YOU be the one to end it. And make sure you end it on a high note.
She WANTS you to take the lead. She wants you to be in charge. She wants to be attracted to you.
It matters less what you do at every stage of the game than just making sure that you’re the one leading it.
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posted in Body Language
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