The Nice Guy – Extreme Edition

by Eric Disco
Mar 7

Some girl on Reddit posted this profile of a guy from OKCupid.

Listened to 14 years worth of complaints about bad boyfriends, your bad day and everything else that’s wrong with you.

Have helped hundreds, possibly thousands of people just by listening and trying to cheer them up. The first person I ever helped said she stopped cutting herself because she had me. Another person told me she’d never, ever say “I love you” to anyone again the day she met me, later she said it to me. So I kept on helping. “I’m not looking for wealth or glory, I’m just buying that stairway to heaven Jesus sang about.”

Lots of heart, kindness, caring. To this point it’s been thrown away by jerks. So lots of hurt too. It’s not possible for me to have been any nicer to people than I have but no good deed goes unpunished and all that.

Still believe in chivalry.

I spend a lot of time thinking about Why girls have such incredibly bad taste in guys. “He locked her in a box for months on end and called her ugly and gay”…yah…and /’m the one that can’t find a gf!?!?

You want someone that’s sweet, kind, caring, wants you for you and nothing else after all the complaining how you can’t eeevvveeerrr find someone like that and it would make you s00000000 happy to have such a guy…and then throw him away when you get it.

You should message me if you are sweet and caring. Not just one of those people that say you are then act like a total ass when it’s time to show it.

Sex thing, not a chance. Nil. Ziltch. Nadda. Zero. Not only has every girl I dated that already had sex cheated on me I’ve promised someone that if I ever changed my mind on it she’d be the first I ask. It’s been a very long time and she once told me I was the prince charming she dreamed of when she was a little girl so I would NOT do that to her. I wouldn’t do it to anyone really. If I would I’d be a terrible person and you wouldn’t want me anymore. But the point is were I to change it I’d have to ask her and she’d still say yes.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to be my girlfriend.

What makes me cringe is that this guy is an extreme version of the way I used to be back in the day.

When you adopt a self-righteous demeanor like this, you can blame everyone but yourself when things don’t go your way.

If you always play the angel, you never have to go through the pain of stepping outside of your comfort zone and doing things that scare you.

The scary part is that you can stay a momma’s boy like this all your life if you don’t figure out how to change.

And you’ll think there’s something wrong with the world instead of yourself until your dying day.


posted in Self-Improvement Strategies

7 responses
KL says:

It’s funny, for a nice guy, he sounds kind of like a jerk. He’s a nice asshole.

That’s what allowing people to walk over you and not going after what you want will do to you.

Also, admitting that he’s been cheated on multiple times in the past–talk about too much information! He sounds emotionally damaged, which from a girl’s perspective is a super turn off.

What were the girls’ reactions to this?

Eric Disco says:

There’s a whole discussion about it on Reddit. You can see my post there as well as a few others. Check it out here.


emog says:

if you ask me , i would say that this totally could be written on the profile ,all girls are going to be OMG..he is so right and can come to me but underneath somewhere between my profile its going to say indirectly that ,

“hey i am providing you these fantasy because you love the drama it carries but You know you just want it for the sake of it and what you really want lies in between somewhere in our mind ,to which nobody will ever be able to point and they won’t be able to judge you to put labels on you ,specially the slut one,even though you open yourself quite adventorously to me and that you will and me too ,so be ready for it ”

Because they all come to find nice guys just to leave with a bad boy ones.All they want is a wrapper on the guy ,which keeps society away from letting her and him explore each other in a ways THEY want without getting judged.So why not give her that wrapper with a label sticked to it that says “It just happened”.

C says:

Hello, Eric,

I’ve been into pick up since David Deangelo back in the early 2000′s. I’ve been up and I’ve been down. Learned a lot of great insight and learned a lot of bad habits as well. What you teach is spot on with the way it should be taught, and understood. So I thank you.

Every now and then i meet a girl who changes my game and puts me upside down so to speak. I’m in that hole right now. I’ve been dating a seemingly amazing girl but I can feel that I’m more I to her than she is into me. Obviously I want the tables turned. Today I texted her that I don’t want her to feel as though she’s bound to me and totally has the freedom to do anything she wants, and meet who she wants. To which she replied “thanks” and jokingly said “well you’re bound to me and not allowed to have any fun without me” J/k. I really don’t want her to date or meet other people but I feel like I’m losing control of this one. I just want to have the upper hand and bring us closer together (I think). I do like her a lot and I know she likes me but I really feel like something is holding her back from really liking me more. How can I make this girl genuinely crazy about me? I’m losing this battle dude, and it’s not awesome. Please help.



Eric Disco says:

Hey Man,

First, it’s okay to feel the way you do. Whenever you meet a girl you really like, there is usually some question about whether you can keep up with her. You’re going to be a little bit off balance. That’s okay.

What you said to her actually isn’t that bad, but you really need to be careful with stuff like that because it has a bit of a serious tone. You want to keep things as light as possible. Don’t bring up a talk about the relationship, let her do that. She did the correct thing, which was to joke it off. And it sounds like this girl is into you. So have some faith in yourself. Check out this post here, When You Think About Her Too Much.

Since you say that it seems like there’s something holding her back from going deeper, I would employ some of these tactics here. Just pull out one a week or so and see how she responds: Advanced Tactics to Turn Back the Tide.


C says:

Thank you man,

You’re awesome. Do you do phone coaching? I need to work on some sticking points and get some real advice to take me to the next level.



Eric Disco says:

Hey Man,

I do phone coaching. Shoot me an e-mail at this address and we’ll talk about details.