The Reason You Can’t Succeed with Women

by Eric Disco
Jul 19

This post is from my good friend Cory Skyy.

Steve is different than most guys out there.

Steve and I are at a small dance club. Several cute girls are dancing up against him, just having a good time. I’m not surprised.

We’ve been dancing for a while. I need some fresh air so I grab him and we go outside.

On our way back in, I see a few cute girls standing over at a table near the bar. We position ourselves next to them.

Within minutes I’m talking to one of the girls. Steve is talking to one of her friends. We’re laughing and joking around about silly stuff, just getting to know one another.

Pretty soon, the girl with Steve is all over him, touching him and getting sexual.

This kind of attraction is nothing out of the ordinary for Steve.

Steve has something most other guys don’t have: a wheelchair. He’s quadriplegic.

When I first met Steve I did not know how I was going to work with him. I had never known a guy like him before.

A car accident 25 years ago left Steve wheelchair-bound. Since then, he’s been doing everything in his power to live a normal life.

Before Steve and I began working together, a night like this was completely outside of his reality.

Even though he was wheelchair-bound, he already had a lot going for him before I met him. He was positive, social and confident. But he felt there was still something missing in his life.

Steve contacted me because he wanted more choice with women.

I made sure Steve’s physical challenges did not affect my belief that I could help him become great with women. I looked beyond his physical challenge and focused on his mindset–which is at the core of my teaching.

I truly believe that I am no different than he is. If I can have it, so can he.

I worked with Steve for six months on his mindset, eye contact, and lifestyle. Through our work, he developed a strong sexual confidence that attracts women to him from across any venue.

Through powerful eye contact and presence, he communicates an edge that brings out a woman’s deepest desires. He now lives a life that most guys would only dream of.

He’s constantly sending me pictures of hot new girls he’s dating.

Women approach him everywhere he goes. It’s a normal thing for him now.

And it’s not just women that approach him. Guys come up to him and tell him they wish they could be like him.

One guy asked him where he could get a wheelchair because he thought that’s how Steve was attracting all these women.

I can assure you, the attraction has nothing to do with the wheelchair.

After about 15 minutes of talking to my girl, I turn around and see the girl with Steve straddling him. They’re making out intensely.

The girl I’m talking to is starting to get angry with me. I won’t tell her what I do for work. She is extremely persistent in trying to find out.

I keep telling her vague things like, “I am the bridge between where someone currently is and where they want to be,” or “I help guys improve their lives.”

The more time passes, the more pissed she gets. She wants a standard answer like “I’m an attorney” or “I’m a fireman.”

In the meantime, Steve and his girl are getting more and more sexual right behind us.

Eventually, Steve overhears our conversation. Even though he’s consumed in his situation, he realizes how pissed she’s getting.

He peeks his head out from around the girl on top of him–the friend of the girl I’m talking to–and yells, “Hello???? He teaches guys how to do this!!!!!”

She looks at me with a blank stare.

“Oh!” she says. She asks me a couple more questions about my business. I can feel her energy shifting radically.

She moves closer to me with every moment. We start making out.

This is what Steve and I consider just an average night. We get together on a regular basis and have a blast every time.

For Steve, anything is possible. He never let anything stop him from living the life that he desires.

If you think you have it hard–think again. There’s only one question you need to ask yourself: “What is stopping me from having what I want?”

It’s probably not what you think it is.

Take care,

Cory Skyy


Check at Cory Skyy’s new mentoring program here.

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posted in Attraction, Self-Improvement Strategies

COMMENTS
93 responses
Paul says:

I am sorry but I truly do not believe this article.

Perhaps these women are not very attractive, then I could possibly understand it. I mean I have fully empathy for any of my fellow humans but I can tell you from my own experiences, women are just brutal. Particularly good looking women. They are self centered on the whole and brutal to men.

The are very picky and they have their choice of men. If they are to pick between a guy with a disability or a tall, well built good looking guy – are you really saying that eye contact is going to win her over? What kind of bull is this? Its just like the confidence myth. Its bull. I thought I had read it all.

Women are brutal. They only want the best right? How can you print such false hope?

KL says:

Believe it, Paul. Truth is typically stranger than fiction.

Question for you: how is YOUR eye contact? Because I have seen amazing things happen with the right eye contact.

Eye contact is essential to everything in this game. Cory Skyy is one of the few guys out there I have seen who really talks about it. Most don’t.

If you don’t have eye contact with her, you have nothing. Absolutely nothing. This is one of those few things that is non-negotiable and transcends personal style.

Not to mention the other stuff like presence, vibe, etc.

So again, just to focus on eye contact, how is yours?

Paul says:

My eye contact is very good. Direct when needed, playful when needed. Reflective and emotional when needed. I have attempted to train it well. I have studied Cory’s stuff and fully understand the eye contact thing. I use it myself. I have even studied and used it for business. I have tried it in bars, social settings with girls and while it may work to a degree with women in general, for attractive women you need much more than that. Much more than eye contact. They want it all. Lets be realistic here.

Attractive women are attracted to height, status, money, athletic builds and such. They want it and get it all. Its for them to choose. I do agree that eye contact does come into some play in the “dance”, but its part of the package, not a major sole component like Cory states.

I just do not buy it and do not believe that if you do not have eye contact you have nothing. I have friends that are terrible at eye contact and conversation as well but because they are either tall or good looking or well connected they date some very attractive women. Women want that kind of stuff. So I am afraid I disagree with that.

Paul says:

I am serious this article is just so wrong. So wrong.

KL says:

Sure, other stuff matters. But there is very little that is more important than eye contact, done in the right way. Why would a woman want to fuck a man who never looks her in the eye? If your friends are getting women, it means they do have decent eye contact on some level. They’re probably not getting as many women as consistently as someone like Cory though.

We’re talking about SEXUAL attraction, what makes a woman hot and horny, not her theoretical “ideal man.”

The sexually attractive man relates not to what she logically “looks for in a man”, but to the primal, instinctual and emotional. Two very different things.

Take a guy like Russell Simmons. In the words of one blogger, he looks like “shit on a stick.” Yet he has banged tons of hot models and other babes. You will say it’s cuz he’s rich/ famous/ high status. That’s a factor, but if that was the only reason, then how come those women didn’t choose younger, fitter, taller, better-looking men with the same or similar wealth and status?

Here’s the irony: those women probably DO choose those fitter and taller men. But guess what–it’s not a zero sum game! News flash: the same woman can fuck more than one guy! Each guy is a different package, with a different mix of strengths and weaknesses. You do the best you can, be your best self, with what you have.

pua vault says:

to the naysayers about guys in wheelchairs, one needs not go any further than watching the simplepickup guys on youtube, where they go around sitting in wheelchairs and get more numbers than your average guy with 2 fully functioning legs.

Paul says:

And you tell me that is real? They are not staged? Are these guys for real in wheelchairs? Are you that daft?

Believe me I am sure guys in wheelchairs do date and get married. But go around and pickup girls randomly? Sorry but this is so wrong….to be honest its dishonest….this is why so many people think PUA is a scam on the whole…

Cory Skyy says:

Hey guys,

I understand how this story could be one of dis belief. God knows when I started working with him I honestly did not know if I could turn him into what he really wanted. But I personally never gave up faith in my ability to teach him and never gave up faith in him. Steve is actually an amazing man in every way possible. This particular story was only one of many stories I have about Steve and all the crazy shit he gets into on a regular basis. Last year I took my girl over to one of his parties. She sat back and watched him do his thing with the girls on the dance floor. She smiled real big, looked at me and said ‘wow’ I bet just seeing that makes you feel great. then said I wish that was on video because the shit that was happening would be really hard to describe to someone and make them believe it.
Honestly Steve has more a fun fulfilled lifestyle than many people I know. and yes he does use his eyes, he naturally attracts beautiful women to him everywhere he goes. It just ‘is’

Quote: Attractive women are attracted to height, status, money, athletic builds and such.
Dude: the women you are referring to are the extremely superficial ones and that is a very small percentage of women. Honestly those are the types of women you shouldn’t even be bothering with anyways. They have a ton of insecurities within themselves and are trying to find a man to fulfill them. The problem is that is not how it works, until she fills those voids within herself she will always be a *(&(*&* lol
In my July Mentoring lesson I actually went into great detail on this topic, all the most common misconceptions guys have about women, (That is one-it is nothing more than a personal limiting belief that you have- its not true) then I go into great detail talking about what women really want in a man. I would recommend checking it out. You can go and sign up for a free 30 day trial and cancel any time.

Paul says:

Hi Cory,

I really have a hard time believing this. I have seen so many women make fun of disabled guys (on a good friend of mine missing an arm from birth), laughing behind their backs, calling them cripples and its really sickening. So when I read this I thought, my gosh if this is not true this is really not honest and fair.

But women are cruel to most men, except the adorable hunk or money types for they love them. I been around myself and for the most part, I find not just in the minority but in the majority attractive women (as opposed to say average or plain women – there is a big difference here) are pretty shallow creatures. They are not the minority by a long shot. I have lived in a number of large cities and they are pretty much the same where ever you go. Hell I was married before to a beautiful woman and I left her before totally killed my heart. Lets face it attractive women are pretty shallow and petty creatures. Full of themselves. Its a a shame because a guy (me) would like to date a beautiful woman and they are so rotten no matter what I try. Sure they are insecure and you are correct there but that is the majority of them from what I have found. Just my experiences and I cant change that.

Thank you for the note.

nonstop says:

“Sure they are insecure and you are correct there but that is the majority of them from what I have found. Just my experiences and I cant change that.”

There seems to be a common denominator: you. If you keep running into the same type of women wherever you go, it’s probably not them.

Food for thought.

Ben says:

thank you for this inspiring post.

Cameron says:

Well personally I believe what Corry says about women, since I’ve heard he’s one of the best guys in the world when it comes to women, if not the best.

This is good for me to hear because I have ezcema, sometimes my skin is bad and its easy to get down on myself and start blaming everyone and the world. Why me blah blah blah.

But hearing about someone with a much greater disadvantage who’s killing it really puts all my “problems” in perspective. Thanks Corry.

Cory Skyy says:

Paul, it really sounds like you have had a lot of bad experiences with women which has caused you to have this negative outlook. Women are not all bad, if you have a bad outlook on women and only focus on the negative like-their shallow-they only like good looking guys- they only like guys with money etc… you will only attract that type of women.
If you could get rid of all those negative thoughts and developed a new perception about women like, women are beautiful, kind, generous, loving, caring, nurturing, sexual, fun, playful, joyful etc… you would start attracting that type of women which would totally change your perception.
about the comment of people that make fun of people with disabilities, dude if someone is going to make fun of someone that has a disability that is just a shitty person. Sure there are a lot of shitty people in the world but it is your choice to be a good person and your choice to surround yourself with good people.
You can look at the world as a bad, evil place or you can look at it as beautiful, prosperous, fun, exciting. That is completely up to you. The person that sees the world as bad is going to have a shitty life and attract a lot of bad people to them. The person that sees the good in life is going to attract more good into their life. again it is up to you on how you view yourself and the world around you.

Munch says:

If you believe attractive women only want tall rich men, arn’t you approaching them believing they don’t want you? I mean that sounds like catastrophic failure of inner game. You have to be communicating “I am not worthy” with those kind of beliefs running through your mind.

Its part of how women select. If they see you expect rejection they believe you have been turned down by women of their level all the time in the past

Paul says:

@Munch

I do not agree. Neither do I agree with the law of attraction where one states that “you attract what you put out.” That is crazy too.

Women do not select that way. They select based on evolutionary roots. They select on attractiveness, they select on dominance, they select on status and what they can gain from the whole interaction. Its about what they think they can gain. It might be arm candy, it might be wealth, it might be popularity. At least that is what I have found.

Cory Skyy says:

This is what one of my guys in my forum said and I completely agree… you attract exactly what you are. If your a fun dude who has many women in his life than it’s probable that your friends will as well. If you like watching the Simpsons and eating doughnuts, so will your friends. Do you see where I’m going with this?

KL says:

Evolution has programmed women to search for men with high confidence, high sense of self-worth and who have an interesting and exciting life they are passionate about.

Therefore, men who have self-doubt and who think they have been “defeated” before they have opened their mouth will obviously not be attractive to women.

I experience these kinds of self-doubts all the time, I think we all do. But a temporary funk is different from giving up permanently.

Nelson says:

Paul,

There are truths to what Cory says, Steve’s story, and what you’ve said as well.

You said, “Women do not select that way. They select based on evolutionary roots. They select on attractiveness, they select on dominance, they select on status and what they can gain from the whole interaction. Its about what they think they can gain. It might be arm candy, it might be wealth, it might be popularity. At least that is what I have found.”

I agree, because I know attraction is not a choice. I know that women and men do not choose to just suddenly become attracted to each other but to be attractive and have these qualities that draw the other person in IS a choice. That’s why women take two hours putting on make up, making sure their eyeliner is even and their top matches with their makeup and shoes. For guys it’s working out, dress up, and look confident. I also know that women aren’t like guys. yeah, there are shallow girls out there, but women are attracted to that guy who’s comfortable in his own skin, who loves himself, and who’s going to let her know, yes he’s interested, he genuinely wants to get to know her, its okay to get to know her, he knows he already has everything to intrigue her and offer her, what does SHE have to offer him. Women likes it when a guy has that “I want you….but I don’t need you” attitude. it’s non-needy, it’s challenging, it’s genuine. I know anyone can have these qualities. Old, young, skinny, fat, wheel-chair, or any normal person. I fucking believe it. Yes, I agree with you that women like dominance, popularity, status, etc, etc. and I also believe a guy on a wheelchair can be dominant, he can be popular, he can have status, and he can have a choice with his life, the women he wants, and the things that he wants. what the fuck does a wheel chair has to do with anything? wheel chair or not, Steve is a man like you and me. He’s got a penis! he loves women, and just like us, he already has this natural ability to be attractive. the only difference is he’s sitting down and doing this most of the time. put a fucking hot babe on a wheelchair, I’d fuck her. shiiiiiiiit .

Jonathan says:

@Paul

I don`t want to insult you, but to me it looks like you are full of self-pity and work hard to keep your limiting beliefs.

I am not sitting physically in a wheel chair, but have been in a psychically or mentally equivalent for most of my life. Since about two years I am working hard to dig myself out of this hole. Most of my lifetime I dreamt of
beautiful women, models, playmates by my side; and I believed that as an average guy I never would have a chance. I am 55 now, almost bald, wearing glasses, of average height, but at least slim. I hate to get involved with fashion stuff, I just love wearing old blue jeans and t-shirts or sweatshirts.
Then I had read about the famous (within PUA circles) eye contact experiment of David Shade and got inspired to do my own experiments, because I was strongly fascinated by this subject.

Today I can easily attract tons of women in their twenties (and teenagers as well if I would), now matter how good they look, simply by powerful eye contact and appropriate body language, without saying one word. The only major difference between cute women and hot bombshells I noticed is that the latter have less patience with me if I don`t proceed approaching them fast (i.e. start talking, introducing myself).

Lots of you may laugh, but I certainly won’t give up easily on my goal
to have playmate-type girls around me, by the dozen (no I am not rich, I am a happily underpaid freelancer with lots of sparetime)

P.S. I protocol my experiences in my blog, it is in german though.

Cory Skyy says:

women are not rational begins and they do not think rationally when they are making a decision about the man they are attracted to and want to be with. As david d says, attraction is not a choice. ‘It is’

But being attractive is a choice and any man can develop the characteristics that women are so fond of and melt over.

Are women attracted to guys with 6 pack abs in super great shape?
Are women attracted to that super hot GQ model?
Or guys that have lots of money?

No… that is not what women are naturally attracted to, that is what society/media has taught women to think is attractive, and has led men to believe that women are attracted to that so guys strive to have those things.

That is not what women are naturally or instinctually attracted to.

Paul says:

Cory,

Of course women are attracted to hot guys and guys with money. Women do not put up calendars or photos of Louie Anderson or Danny Devito in their cubicles because “they make them laugh” – no they put up calendars or photos of Brad Pitt or the Chippendales.

9 times out of 10 when you see an attractive woman, she is either with a good looking guy or some kind of monied guy.

So you are telling me that eye contact will trump abs, height or money? I just cannot believe that. I am sorry. Women love that stuff. There is no way that eye contact will trump that for a totally physically able or disabled guy. Women are just shallow to do that.

KL says:

When women do put up photos of guys, of course they will put the visually appealing guys–it’s a visual medium. But women generally do not do that because, unlike us, they are not so visual when it comes to sex. Hence romance novels–the only visual (aside from the cover) is the words on the page, 99% of the experience is emotional and psychological.

Anybody who thinks women operate in the same way men do–physical, visual–is missing the boat.

Cameron says:

Paul, do you see the irony in lecturing the worlds greatest PUA about what women find attractive?

Steve says:

I really don’t understand this need to be right; this is all ego-talk.

Things work for some that doesn’t work for others. I’m not saying debate isn’t healthy but for God sake this isn’t going to conclude.

PUA is about going out and doing rather than thinking and words. Read Eric’s last article anyway.

Steve

Cory Skyy says:

Women are not shallow beings, all do respect but it is shallow to say that they are. There is a lot more to it than just being tall, dark and handsome. It is the mindset and belief system that guy has that naturally draws women to him.

Let me ask you this? Take an average looking guy that does not have much success with women, this guy thinks women are all shallow, and has a belief that beautiful women are only attracted to the tall, dark, handsome guy that has money.

Do you think this guy is going to get the women he really wants? No

If you truly want to become a ladies’ man- or that guy that women naturally gravitate to than you need to work on developing the characteristics that women are naturally drawn to.

Which is not being tall dark and handsome

You and every other guy have the ability to do this. It starts with understanding what women are really attracted to though.

Cory Skyy says:

Here is a picture of Steve at one of my parties.

http://www.coryskyy.com/public/viewimage.cfm?ImgID=29

Paul says:

Cory,

He looks like a great guy and I think its great that he is successful per your words and photo…

If looks and so forth are not so important, then why do I constantly run into personal ads (and in real life) that have lines in it like this:

“I prefer men that are taller then me by at least a few inches, it is important to me because I am almost five foot eight. I think it is best to be honest and not waste anyone’s time.”

If women are not so shallow, then why do I run into this over 75% of the time? Seems pretty shallow to me.

And believe me you are not going to change a woman’s mind on this unless a guy has money or something to outweigh it and its not personality…I have been there before in that situation so many times.

What are your thoughts?

Lee says:

@Cory Dude, all I have to say to you is this: I love you, man! Thank You for the awesome article and the pic. It really is incredibly inspirational. — Lee

Lee says:

@Paul You know Cory’s thoughts. Why even ask? Men keep offering you their testimonials of self improvement. I offered you the opportunity to come to NY and meet my friend, a guy who is both very successful with women and is completely outside of your tall, good looking, rich American stereotype. I told you that he would show you how a short Indian man with an accent can routinely attract all-American blondes inches taller than himself. What is it you are hoping to hear here that you haven’t heard before? You want studies, here is a link to an online study that uses a very sophisticated statistical analysis on a very large data set of both men and women to show that they are less concerned with looks than men are: http://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/viewdoc/summary?doi=10.1.1.61.4010. What more do you want, dude? If you are not willing to come see it, and you are not willing to believe anyone who has told you they’ve seen it, and you’re not willing to believe studies, what is it that would satisfy you? Isn’t it time to just move on? You’re not going to find people here who will enthusiastically confirm your defeatist attitude. — Lee

nonstop says:

“It starts with understanding what women are really attracted to though.” and that is ? :P

Rick says:

I don’t know what are they really attracted too…do you?.. Good question…

Cory Skyy says:

I went into this topic in great deal on the July lesson in the CS Mentoring Program.
‘what women really want in a man and how you can develop these characteristics’
If you want to find out what women really want than go check it out. Sign up for the free 30 day trial, it wont cost you anything, you can cancel any time and you can keep the recordings. Actually if you sign up now you can dial into the Q&A call I am holding on Monday at 5pm EST.

Paul–

Ignore the personal ads. People can articulate their ‘type’ on paper but that’s just because they’re allowed to select from a bunch of filters.

That has nothing to do with who they’re actually sexually attracted to, who they sleep with, who they end up with. If you’re not their ‘type’ maybe you’ll have to highlight your other sexual qualities…but that’s exactly what everyone here is training each other to do.

You have a lot of false preconceived notions and negative conventional wisdom that you need to get rid of in order to succeed in this area.

Daddy says:

Paul,
I have just found this sight because I am currently working through the approaching women program by David DeAngelo but I want to also look at the info on this sight and have support from other guys on this path. About me, I am way above average in looks, I am 32, I don’t get rejected a lot, have been engaged three times(average to below average looking women), and 95 percent of the time I couldn’t STOP dating women I wasn’t attracted to. It got so bad that I went to the psychiatrist. It was demoralizing because gorgeous women would smile at me all the time, but then I couldn’t approach and even if they approached me instead of me saying yes, I would say no-I really started wondering if I was crazy. I really wanted to commit suicide back then because I was sure I was doomed. To add insult to injury due to my former religious beliefs(Christian), I couldn’t train to become a pick up artist because of being brain washed in the church. I am now a proud atheist and I have no moral restrictions about learning this information. I am actually going out and starting to interact with hot women(just saying hi as I pass by, once in a while starting a conversation, but it’s progress). Why I mention all of this is that if you honestly believe that unrealistically attractive women only like guys that look like me, take a look at someone like Shannon Elizabeth. Her ex husband(who to the best of my knowledge WAS NOT famous accept through her), he made Ron Jeremy look pretty! The problem is you, just as the problem is me. Look at all of the unrealistically attractive women out there with fugly looking guys. It made me sick to observe this my whole life and I couldn’t lay a finger on those hotties no matter if they came over and talked to me. There was even a time I had six pack abs(using self talk to get myself to go and do the Body for Life), and I still couldn’t make it happen. The problem is inside of you…

Daddy says:

I didn’t become an atheist to pursue this path, but I became a Nichiren Buddhist which is humanism(and as a Buddhist I considered myself an atheist). I don’t consider myself to have a religion anymore but I still practice Buddhism. I do have one question though. I am attempting to eradicate my approach anxiety by chanting for many hours as opposed to using self talk(just started chanting to get rid of it, noticing improvements but not there yet and it could take several months as other issues were fixed within several months or weeks, and I have 2 self talk routines about approaching women and being good enough to get a really hot woman). I eliminated my emotional attachment to Christianity, Alcoholics Anonymous, ex girlfriends, problems dating women I am not attracted to, depression/suicidal thoughts, so on and so forth by chanting(not prostelyzing, but it worked). Doesn’t it make sense that chanting should work the same in this situation? I don’t mean to bring up any religious practice, but if I can make it work to where there is no anxiety as though I was a computer or a machine, shouldn’t I just keep after it till it happens? It should work but I have had this problem for so many years that it feels like I am in Stargate SG1 taking on the Goa’uld or in Star Trek DS9 taking on the Dominion or the Borg…Also I am dealing with piles of resentments towards the church because back when I was Christian these so called “friends” of mine would guilt trip me into not following the path to become a pick up artist telling me some blatant bullshit like “just turn it over to God” which was real easy for them to say because their girlfriends looked like Victoria Secret models and those fuckers never had the hangups or issues with sex that I have. Will that resentment hold me back if it doesn’t turn up when I am talking to women(IE:not talking about past problems, or how much I hate the church, etc etc)? I will never forgive them even on my death bed and any of them I used to know who try to cross that line with me now, I verbally slam them in the corner and demand that they apologize to me and I speak as condescendingly as possible to them for daring to have the audacity to try to hold me back from getting laid when I am a grown assed man. No one will EVER again emotionally blackmail me into not having sex with unrealistically attractive women and doing whatever I want to do whether they like it or not. In fact, when I do fix this and I have a chick that looks like a Victoria Secret model, I will go out of my way to shove her in their face and make them look foolish…

Daddy says:

Paul,
just talk down to an unrealistically attractive woman like you were her dad making her laugh(bordering on sexual harrasment) and see what happens. You have to make her laugh while doing this otherwise it WON’T WORK because you will come off as an arrogant asshole. Talk to her like Dr. Gregory House would talk to Dr. Cuddy. If you are in a conversation with a woman whose face is so perfect it looks porcelon, like a playboy model, and she obviously spends hours prettying herself up, tell her something like this:

your nails sure do look pretty today. So where did you buy them at, the dollar tree?

Or for a woman with a really really short skirt who is unrealistically hot:
Nice skirt, where’s the rest of it? Don’t you look really yummy today young lady. So what did daddy say when you walked out the door half naked?

Or:
Do you have a personality to match your looks? If you did I’d say you are a gem, but if you didn’t then I’d say we will have to get you some etiquitte 101 classes or something.

Or if she laughs and touches your arm glare at her and say:
No I will not have sex with you!(and wink at her)

After she shows interest then BLOW HER OFF and make her chase you.

I know for a fact that saying things like this to a woman like you are referring to will negate whether she “only” wants a guy that is several inches taller than she is. She thinks she only wants a guy like that, or model handsome, or with money, etc etc etc, but what she really wants is a man to be dominate unlike the other 200 or so pussies who didn’t have the balls to talk to her in a way that gets her panties wet(because that dominance triggers her mating sequence in accordance with evolutionary psychology). A dominate male will represent to her what will produce the strongest offspring. A male that acts more like a woman, “sensitive”, not willing to take risks-not being willing to take a risk would send a message to her that he might not be willing to take the risk of killing the bear or tiger that might threaten the tribe or the children she bears by you-a WOMAN doesn’t take a risk like that(she can, but why should she?). If you act like that and still can’t pull it off, you might be coming off as an asshole. Make her laugh(like House makes Cuddy laugh, yeah it’s a TV show, but he eventually fucked her).

Paul says:

Daddy,

What you are telling me to do is basically a combination of cocky and funny and Mystery Method. I have tried them both for a couple of years and they do not work. Women do not chase you for telling them “were is the rest of your skirt.” That is absurd and I know that at least for me, it never worked. If anything thing they chicks got ticked off at me and left. So that was chasing?

Sorry man but you are waaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy far off….

Daddy says:

Then you are flat out doing it wrong because it has always worked for me.

Daddy says:

You have to watch your body language, and it works the best on unrealistically attractive women. You have to watch the inflections in your voice, and you have to watch the timing of your sentences. If you get any of these wrong you will crash and burn. Also you may not be trying it on enough women, because if you only act cocky and funny to like 3 women as opposed to 30, then yes the odds are against it working. Also what are you wearing when you act like that? How do your teeth look? What ELSE are you talking about(because cocky and funny is not about what you say but about the message you send). Do you for instance make a smart assed remark and then talk about the ex girlfriend that it didn’t work with. Do you try to be her therapist? Do you right after talking to her for 3 minutes or so flaunt talking to another woman right in front of her? The questions go on and on but I hope you get the idea. The other thing is that if you are insecure on the inside you will send off those vibes that you are NOT the dominate male, and therefore cocky and funny probably won’t work for you.

Daddy says:

Do you make smart assed remarks and if she gets offended, then you apologize or make an amends because you feel guilty for it? If you do that you will fail because it will show that you ARE NOT the dominate male, you are a beta. I used to feel guilty for acting like that because of Christianity. If you have something like that from childhood holding you back, you will send off the message that you are not the dominate male(cocky and funny goes against Christianity). Cocky and funny used to not work for me as well, but I was doing it WRONG(I sent out the wrong vibes due to being a beta which SABOTAGED it so it wouldn’t work). It took me a long time to play with it before it really started working(and it ALL came down to the brainwashing I had growing up in the church). Also, as convinced as you are that this stuff doesn’t work, then you will subconciously(in your body language, inflections in your voice, attitude, etc etc) cause it to not work. If you look around you can find TONS of examples of guys that act just like that and they are going out with the hottest women. When I was in Japan while I was in the Navy, who always had the hottest Japanese girls? Black guys in the barracks(they were raised differently than me, I am caucasion). Most black guys I have been friends with ALWAYS acted cocky and funny. They just don’t give a fuck as far as women, and they always had the hottest Japanese girls. I was quite jealous but now I understand why they had those type of Japanese women.

Daddy says:

Us caucasions in the barracks almost NEVER had Japanese women as hot as the ones that the black dudes were fucking, that is because all of those guys act cocky and funny and very few white guys I knew acted cocky and funny.

Daddy says:

Actually the abs, money, looks, etc etc as Cory stated, women ARE attracted to, even David D. says that. But if a guy doesn’t have those, he can trigger the same buttons inside of attractive women that those things trigger and she’ll treat him the same. Women aren’t rational beings, they are women. When you think about Darwinian psychology, it all makes sense. If you believe that you can’t do this and it won’t work, then don’t waste your time and just quit whining about this stuff. Go ahead and feel sorry for yourself, makes me no difference. More women for me to fuck, I’ll be more than happy to get them to call me daddy while you are fantasizing about them…

Daddy says:

Even though I won’t waste my time trying to convince you about this Paul since you seem to just want to complain and feel sorry for yourself as opposed to doing whatever it takes to fix your situation, what exactly do you mean by “it doesn’t work”? What are your expectations? Women chasing you when you make smart assed remarks(very small percentage of the time for ANYONE-otherwise we wouldn’t need to tell them to give us their number). Women seeing you across the room and they approach you? Women asking you out? Women calling you? Every woman wanting you by your body language? If it is anything like these or any variation on these, you are living in a fantasy world.

Paul says:

Daddy,

The bottom line here is that women want it all and if they are attractive they will hold out until they find a perfect guy for them. They want and crave great abs, height, status and if a guy does not have that, he cannot make that up. It does not follow evolution. The woman will smell you out as a fake right? Its not that I believe that this does not work, its that I have personally tried it, spent a fortune on all kinds of programs, done the approaches and have nothing to show for it except frustration.

And why did the Japanese like the black dudes over the white dudes? Its a matter of inches my friend if you get my drift

Daddy says:

Then just go and keep on failing with hot women. Better yet, go be a slave to the fearsome Jehova and just “turn it over to God” and go marry some 300 pound woman or skinny woman that you’re not attracted to-then you get to have no self respect for yourself and you get to lie to them for the rest of your life while the so called “friends” at church stab you in the back telling you what a wonderful thing Jesus did for you by bringing this woman into your life. At this point that is about your only option-faith and spirituality. Most importantly, if all you have is frustration and this stuff obviously isn’t working for you, then quit. Go sell all the programs to pay for your wedding to a woman you aren’t attracted to, and get on with your life. As assholelish as what I just said sounds, it is true and you know it. Just give up. I wish you the best…

Daddy says:

Sorry, the NON-EXISTENT Jehova/Jesus. I am POSITIVE that that will NEVER work, has NEVER worked, and CAN’T work. Gotta love adult imaginary friends.

Daddy says:

Actually Paul, you do have one other option I just thought about. Russian mail order bride. There was a guy that was going to church with one of my friends at a church I used to go to before I became an atheist, and he got a drop dead gorgeous Russian woman through the mail. Everyone at his church told him it was the worst mistake of his life. He was fat, didn’t take care of himself, overall a slob. But she treated him right and it motivated him to get in shape, clean himself up, so on and so forth. Then other guys started thinking about getting a mail order bride since those two were happy together and she was faithful to him.

Cameron says:

Stop being a troll Daddy.

Paul says:

Now I am laughing which is great. You are really out there. Next you will be telling me to get a Stepford robot wife. One never knows. I do not know whether you are insane or just being funny. Sometimes there is a fine there.

Actually I do believe in God and Jesus so hopefully you see the light one day. Does God help with matters of love? I am sure he does. Perhaps I need to go to church more often to find out.

Great stuff Daddy – I feel better just laughing at all this!

Lee says:

@Paul I am not a religious man, but if I had to guess which is vice and which is virtue, I would guess that asking god to provide what you, through some additional effort and perseverance can get yourself is a vice. Complaining less and trying hard to better yourself, even if you fail, is a virtue. So yeah, sorry, Paul, god is not going to send you a hot girlfriend any time soon :-(

–Lee

Daddy says:

Cameron, I’m not being a troll. I’m just being honest with Paul. He will fail due to wanting to fail, and now that I know he is a Christian, he will fail just because he is a Christian. I know because I watched guys in the church who were like us for most of my life(and I denounced Christianity 7 years ago and I am 32-I grew up in the church). The guys who didn’t have issues and they “turned it over to God”, they succeeded(got with the most attractive women in church). The guys who did have issues and they “turned it over to God” failed(got with alright looking women). End of story-these are people I PERSONALLY knew and was friends with, and I have been to churches all over the world. I would bet at least 1000 dollars on that fact if I had it-that Paul just “turning it over to God” will NOT work for him. I would lick the rim of a toilet(with the seat up) in a public restroom(if I lost the bet) because I am so sure that “god” won’t work to fix Paul’s situation. I wish that Christians would grow up and live in reality, not just with this but with finances, politics, sex, etc etc. So again Paul, if you are so sure that your “faith” is going to fix this problem, then why bother with all of this information. Quit, go back to your god, and get on with your life. Why even bother debating it with anyone? You are sure that “god” will bring you a hot woman, then just go to your god. It may take 5-10 years, but you will prove me right.

Daddy says:

When you prove me right, your perception of reality will change so you will lie to yourself(seen guys this too). You will be with some woman who wasn’t your “dream girl” but it’s who god wanted for you. After all, it’s not what you want but what He wants for you. You will simply learn to accept this unbearable situation, and you will never once blame Jehova for you being with a woman you aren’t attracted to. You will say things like I love her despite this that or the other(IE:she’s a little chubby, but you overlook that when you really wanted that hottie who ran Sunday school who looked like a Victoria’s secret model because how you possibly defy Jehova when He didn’t want you with that Sunday school teacher) You will lie, deceive, cheat, commit adultery with your mind, all because you won’t rely on yourself to make this happen. Being with your average looking woman(not the hot Sunday school teacher), you will never love her. You will never enjoy sex(you’ll convince yourself that you do, but yet another lie because while you are boning her you’ll be thinking about the Sunday school teacher and constantly repenting for your lust). Again, this is REALITY-like it or not.

Daddy says:

Trust me Paul, life is much more fulfilling as an Atheist. I would NEVER go back if some fundie nutcase stuck a gun in my mouth trying to force me to denounce my Atheism. I HATE Christianity, but I love Christians so no offense to you as a human being, I just despise your religion.

Daddy says:

Cameron, if you mean me putting Paul down, by calling me a troll, then ok I’ll stop talking to Paul. I almost NEVER talk to people like I have to him, I normally try to uplift people and encourage people. But the way I see it just from watching him posting things, maybe he needs someone to piss him off bad enough that he will do what it takes to fix this problem. I wouldn’t wish failure with women on ANY man no matter if I truly hated that person. I would rather help my worst male enemy to get good talking to women than to tear them down but if tearing them down helped them to take action, then by all means I’ll do it.

Jay says:

Something leads me to believe Paul is deeply insecure. Confidence is not bull and neither is eye contact, etc. You ask how women can be attracted this way when they have an “ideal type?” Allow me to use a martial arts analogy. You can be physically fit as heck, but if you’re fighting a fat guy trained in only one thing–kicking ppl’s ass–the buff guy will lose if he himself is not a martial artist. It’s technique. Furthermore, in the heat of the moment, there are never clean fights. Even martial art masters don’t fight with perfect form and most things go out the window except innate reactions. This is the SAME THING as women when they are sexually aroused. They DON’T GIVE A SHIT about anything else if you are doing things right. So stop with the self-victimizing role and what I hate most is making all women out to be superficial. I know many girl friends who are very pretty and look beyond physical attributes. Women are not as shallow as you make them out to be.

Daddy says:

Amen brother Jay! Any time I have talked down to an unrealistically attractive woman(getting passed all the anxiety and nervousness, and frankly I have been working on myself all week and it is getting easier at school to just start conversations) like I was her dad asking her things like “have you been a good girl today?” sounding like I was talking to a 12 year old, oh my GOD! The reactions. Priceless. Guarantee you that there are very few guys at school if any who are acting like that(just taking a look around at what other guys do). I have figured this much out, tell these women what to do(without being too much of a dick about it). Tell them confidently to write their number down. I have done this about 3 or 4 times this week, and I’ll be damned, they WRITE IT DOWN!!! I will NEVER ask for a woman’s number again. Jay, I LOVE the martial arts analogy! I have chanted Nam-myoho-renge-kyo for at least 12 hours over the last three or four days to not have any anxiety whatsoever when approaching a woman and it has started becoming fairly easy(not total cold approaches, but that will be the next challenge). As you know with eastern philosophy like what Bruce Lee said to his student at the beginning of Enter the Dragon, that there is no enemy, there is no I, the idea if I am not mistaken was that the martial artist moves their strike out and the nonexistent enemy(who is just particles that are a manifestation of the Law of cause and effect) comes to the fist. They are attracted to that persons fist due to being in a fight with that person(maybe I am way off on the analogy, but I am sure from what you said up there you have a good idea of what I’m trying to get at). I also think that the number of women that are as shallow as guys like Paul believe is very small. Even if there were in reality a lot of them, I personally would change myself on the outside to get passed that. I know that’s not reality, and I wouldn’t want one like that(maybe just sleep with her a few times and spank her for being so shallow while I have my cock buried inside of her), if I were Paul I would start going to the gym and get built like a god damn brick wall and maybe get some plastic surgery(if it is that big of an issue for him). One less excuse for me to make if I believed like he does. Thank you Jay.

Daddy says:

One other thing, how should my eye contact be Jay? I have been attempting to hold eye contact a little too long when talking to them, until they drop their eyes from mine as a sign of submission to me. Any suggestions cause sometimes I feel as though I am glaring at them and it kind of creeps me out. I feel sleezy when doing it.

Paul says:

This is getting funnier. Look I do not expect God to give me a hot girlfriend – not at all. I was just saying it sort of tongue in cheek but also in a way the “you never know” what can happen. I do believe in miracles so call me crazy but I am sure they happen (just look at D-Day or certain events in history for goodness sakes).

@Jay so you say some hot women are not shallow? I guess that could be true but I would say that the super majority are. Why? Well they can and if you think about it most have been catered too during their lives so there is a true sense of entitlement along with dissillusionment and what the media may influence.

Again, its all evolution guys. If you preach evolution, live by it. Do not water it down. Hot women will go with good looking or guys with some kind of value. Why? Well they have something to gain from it. Game or whatever we call this thing (I think it was “charm” in the old days) is just a carnival show. Its a nice try but overall you rarely see hot women with so so guys (unless they are wealthy or status). You see them with hot guys.

Last night I was at a local place and I would say there were about 200 people there with at least 8 hot women there. Everyone of them except one (who works there and was just hanging out) were with taller, good looking guys. Everyone. And this is not uncommon. Its evolution. We are slaves to it.

So yes Jay, women are shallow on the whole at least with looks. Your martial arts thing is an interesting way to look at it, but overall it still does not get to the heart of it. Its the woman that has the control. She can pick who she wants when and where. In a martial arts fight, you really do not have control.

Daddy says:

Then I’m going to ask you this Paul. Do you have the balls to go up to the hottest woman in the club and TELL her to give you her number(after talking to her for a few minutes)? Most of these women you are talking about that you call shallow, guess what? Many of them have low self esteem and they are LONELY which is why they get themselves done up with makeup and what not. Better yet, can you go up to her, tap her on the shoulder, turn her around and start talking to her? I am only 5′ 9” and a half, not ripped anymore, have a face somewhere between Jason Stathom and Bruce Willis, going bald(but I shave my head), am 32(but still look 23-24). I have figured this much out, women period will most likely do what you TELL them to(why do you think those women that followed someone like Charles Manson around followed him around not that I want to be like him). I will say it again to you, I am assuming that you are below average in looks otherwise this wouldn’t be an issue for you(or maybe you just obsess over it WAY too much). Just go get built like a brick wall(so all of those pretty boys will back down from you when you steal their girl from them because you can kick their ass and they know it, you have the power if you are BIGGER than them-if you get big enough to pick up the back end of her boyfriends diesel truck with your bare hands, she’ll jump your dick, not his), and if you have an average face, that’s what plastic surgery is for. Many women, that is if you are willing to do this and NEVER back down, tell them what they are going to do CONFIDENTLY. Don’t be mean about it, if they are talking to a couple of guys at the club just take your happy ass over there, grab her by the shoulder, turn her around, and start talking to her. If you have the balls to do that(I’m still working on it myself) but I’d bet all the money I have ever made in my life that you will be sleeping with someone who looks like Megan Fox eventually. As much of an asshole as I have acted towards you, I don’t care what you look like. If you have the balls to act like that given that you are well dressed and groomed, then I’d bet my money on your success.

Lee says:

@Daddy Give up, dude. You are talking to a man who is going to continue whining forever. We have all posted our stories of success, studies (our own and those of established academics), references to sophisticated analyses showing why evolution doesn’t just favor the good looking and tall, actual age preferences taken at random from online profiles of women, etc., etc. Paul is here to rationalize his own failure. You are wasting your time arguing with him. Eventually, you will see that it is useless. Take solace in the fact that most of us agree with you. –Lee

Paul says:

Daddy,

Yeah I have gone up to the hottest women at clubs. Still do from time to time but not as often as I used too. Hell, I have done it at The Hard Rock Vegas during their infamous Sunday afternoon pool parties, clubs in Vegas, NYC, Chicago, Miami, Chicago, even London and nothing but blowouts. I have tried it all and yes I guess I am using evolution to rationalize this. I have tried it all and its no go.

I dress very well. A bit of classy English Laundry, Polo, Ralph Lauren, Perry Ellis, nice leather boots or shoes – what ever fits the occasion. Think George Clooney with a bit of “rock” to it. I actually get alot of good comments on my dress. No numbers but good comments lol. Sometimes a great blazer with a cool t-shirt, dark jeans (and/or stylish), nice dark leather boots. It just does not work.

But I am always trying to see what does. I have to battle evolution for it favors the handsome, tall and young.

Daddy says:

Lee,
it’s tough for me to just not say anything because like David DeAngelo, I really want to help people(even if I have to be an asshole at times to do it). I guess what kills me with a guy like him is that was me. I sat on Double Your Dating, Self Talk, etc etc, for about 10 years doing exactly what he is doing. It was horrible. Religious people(Christian or Buddhist) were always coming down on me about me wanting to be a pick up artist(and there I was always seeking their approval). It hurts me to see the things that he is typing. I hate that for him. I believe in people’s potential no matter where they are. I used to believe just like him(as far as women). I would blatantly ignore the fact that there were more unrealistically gorgeous women who were with average joe’s then there were with pretty boys. To my eyes, all of those guys no matter how ugly they were looked handsome like Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt(even if they looked like Gene Simmons) which fed into my warped self image. I used to say I was the ugliest guy on the planet which was the cause of my failure to get the hotties. If a hottie came onto me once in a while they had ulterior motives. I am not desirable enough. I am not tall enough. I am not in shape enough. I don’t make enough money. The list goes on and on. I hate seeing people do exactly what I used to because I know from experience that in the middle of it, it looks totally real. It feels totally real. It is a mental loop that unless a person chooses to do the work to break it, they are a slave to it. If I had female friends who told me I’m handsome(when they couldn’t understand why I was depressed over my situation which logically I should have no trouble attracting a hottie), that hottie they spoke of(who at times smiled at me) didn’t come over to my face and tell me I was handsome. My average female friend obviously thought differently than that hottie over there, so she doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Even if the hottie came over and told me what I wanted to hear, someone had to have put her up to it. Someone had to have paid her to say it to insult my dire circumstances. Been there, done that. I read what he types and it actually breaks my heart to see someone in my old situation. It’s hell…

Paul says:

Also wanted to add, these women are only lonely if they want to be lonely. If they are lonely, it is for they want to be lonely or they are just crazy. Most are not. They get all done up for that is part of their psyche. Its part of their life. They dress up for themselves to feel good and for other chicks. Its a bit competitive in those circles. These chicks are out to meet the best and beautiful. This is why Mystery Method is such a crock of crap. Guys will try this stuff (like I did and various friends) and it goes nowhere. These chicks see thru it and they actually laugh at guys. And they are right, its funny. Game is bullcrap. Totally. Its not natural nor follows evolution.

Daddy says:

Paul,
here’s a suggestion just from what you have said. Maybe you need a new look. Trial and error. Also something I was told and despite what I typed before I do believe this to a point. We put off vibes, give people feelings. If no matter what I am doing behavior wise people still react a certain way to me, maybe I need to “change my frequency”. When I was a Nichiren Buddhist(which I still practice because it works though I don’t consider myself to have a religion persay), if I wanted people to act differently towards me at work for instance, I would chant focusing in my minds eye better interactions with them(I have no joke had people who the hateful feelings between us were obviously mutual, they started treating me like their buddy which freaked me out but I wasn’t complaining). I might chant for two hours a day. Then at some point in the future(sometimes the next day, sometimes months later) people started mysteriously treating me differently. That is because the “I” that I perceive to exist and my environment are symbiotic. What happens to me on the inside affects my environment. Like when you get in the “zone” and people act warmer towards you. That is a good example. So if you were putting off these bad vibes no matter what you are doing, that might be why things aren’t going anywhere. If I am putting off the vibes that I am worthless and I am not the dominate male(no matter how much I act like one) it will come across as an act and fake when logically it SHOULD work. We aren’t just dealing with observable behavior, we are more dealing with the underlying stuff that we don’t perceive, at least that is the conclusion I am slowly beginning to accept and when I used to be a Soka Gakkai member, people tried to tell me that but I wouldn’t listen.

Daddy says:

One other thing, if we believe something bad enough(like hot women only date tall men because they are superficial), we will create that reality. Reality exists only in the mind of the perceiver. Everything outside of us is merely virtual reality that gets filtered through our nervous system. What we perceive as laws(physics, mating, etc etc) are all particles. It is possible to bend those laws by changing ourselves on the inside. Obviously if I was missing an arm for instance, I don’t believe I could just believe it is still there and it will regrow, but if I believe it is possible to regrow the limb(as scientists do) then I would set myself on the path of trying to figure out how DNA works so I could manipulate it. If I believe that only handsome men get hotties, then if it were me, I wouldn’t complain about my situation, I personally would get plastic surgery which would change how I feel, and change the vibes I put off therefore changing my reality.

Lee says:

@Daddy He doesn’t want to change. He wants a reason for accepting his failure. Evidence, logic, testimonials – they are all useless. You are wasting your energy, dude. We’ve all been there. –Lee

Daddy says:

Got it. I just wrote about 2 more self talk routines for approaching women. The only thing I notice that I am worrying about is the “what if” question of whether the opener destroys my chance with her. I decided to tell goofy assed stories when I approach them just because other guys aren’t doing that. Like how I saw a video on the net about a woman who taught her cat to eat with chopsticks. If she still gives me her number(doing the three minute email number technique that David D. teaches) then it means that she does actually want me. You got any suggestions Lee? This is mostly concerning cold approaches. Warm approaches are obvious(in class, at work, etc etc). I’ll just leave Paul alone because he just seems to be a psychic vampire. I had a friend who was a psychic vampire and I worked with her for a little over two years and she didn’t want to do what it took for her to change. I no longer talk to her at all because I have moved on with my life. People like her are pitiful but oh well, not my problem.

Lee says:

@Daddy I open with weird shit all the time so yes, I’m a fan. Tell me the three minute email number thing first. Just curious. Not sure I am familiar with it. –Lee

Zhelyazko says:

You want studies, here is a link to an online study that uses a very sophisticated statistical analysis on a very large data set of both men and women to show that they are less concerned with looks than men are: http://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/viewdoc/summary?doi=10.1.1.61.4010.

Ok Lee I read a part(ok a very tiny one) of the study but found nothing of the sort. What I found is this:

In fact, the looks ratings variable has the largest impact on
outcomes among all variables used in the Poisson regression analysis. Men and women in the lowest decile receive only about half as many e-mails as members whose rating is in the fourth decile, while the users in the top decile are contacted about twice as often.

Overall, the relationship between outcomes and looks is similar for men and women.

Height matters for both men and women. Women like tall men (¯gure 5.4). Men in the 6’3″-6’4″ range, for example, receive about 60% more ¯rst contact e-mails than men in the 5’7″-5’8″ range.

Yep I know that you can do extraordinaly good despite not being Brad Pit for example. (Neil Strauss being a bit shorter than me but still being one of the best)

But where is the part in THIS exact study which shows that women care less about looks than men do.

This is not crucial but if someone could post that I would be grateful. (A confidence boost is what I am in need of :D )

Thank you great folks,

Zhelyazko

Zhelyazko says:

Sorry for the lack of quotation marks. Forgot them in the comment and it would not let me edit it. Hope it is not a hindrance.

Daddy says:

Lee,
the three minute email and phone technique is really simple. You talk to a woman for about three minutes. I want to start with an insulting compliment IE:your hair sure looks pretty today. So who helped you fix it up, your mother? (shake her hand), I’m just an asshole who pretends to be a nice guy. Or, (chick that is scantaly dressed), “well aren’t we a tasty treat!” “Don’t you look yummy today, what did daddy say when you walked out the door half naked” etc etc.

then proceed to tell a story, read her palm, etc etc.

After about three minutes, tell her I have to go but it has been nice talking to her. She is expecting me to hover like most guys do and is probably thinking “what the hell”. As I leave, turn around and ask “Do you have email?” Who doesn’t, but she’ll say yes. If she says no, “Do you have electricity?” Anyway, when she says yes, give her a piece of paper and tell her to write her email address down. As she is writing it, tell her to write her number down. Then ask her something like “so is this your real number or fake number?”

Zhelyazko,
that wouldn’t surprise me though because the physical does play a part in attraction(albeit, looks to us is like personality to a woman). The thing all of us need to NOT do, is to use it as an excuse to not approach. I have done that before. Had a good interaction going with a hottie, then some guys came up who were well over six foot tall, pretty boys, and I walked away because how can I compete with their height. My friend who had also been talking to them was pissed with me, he asked them who those guys were and the other girl told him they were friends of theirs. I could have boned that chick that night, but me worrying about this particular thing prevented me from taking action. I am all for getting built like a brick wall AND cultivating my cocky sense of humor, eye contact, doing what Mystery teaches, etc etc so if some guy comes along(once I master my inner game and my outer game) and he is just as good as me, I believe that being that he is in alright shape but at that point I would look like a fitness model, gee, which one is she going to jump on? Also, if I did talk to a jealous boyfriends woman, most places that people go, I would be the biggest guy there and no one would fuck with me. One less excuse to not approach. But being in that kind of shape would also send a message to her-I am disciplined, healthy, will produce the strongest offspring, I can protect her from predators, etc etc. I personally feel that many dating coaches almost blatantly ignore the external as though it is irrelevant. To a point, it is. But if a person ALSO had their outside taken care of(that is unless there were extenuating circumstances, being in a wheelchair for instance-but even then some people in wheelchairs, or amputees, get RIPPED), they would be unstoppable and no one would mess with them if they found themselves in one of those “situation” with her crazy boyfriend. Everyone has to work with the hand their dealt. Think about it, you are out at a club. You are the biggest guy there(without looking like your on steroids-about like the Green Arrow in Smallville but with about 20-30 pounds more muscle and about 6 percent body fat), you talk to this group of women who are unrealistically attractive. Then you simply point at two of them, saying “you and you, let’s go”. You pick them up cave man style and carry them out of the club to go have a threesome! Tell them that “Daddies going to take care of them tonight!” Also, the lower the body fat percentage, the bigger ones dick is!!! Think of how she will look at you when she takes your shirt off and sees a chiseled six pack! Also this all sends a message that you probably have at least some money, also some time. Getting in good shape doesn’t even take that long-Body For Life. Also, Burn the fat, feed the muscle.

Works a high percentage of the time. I will NEVER ask for a womans number again. I will ALWAYS tell them to give me their number.

Lee says:

@Zhelyazko You are missing the most important statistics in the tables. First, the overall factor of looks explains on average about 40% of the variance (depending on whether you look at the 2006 version or the more current version). Second, it explains about 10% of the total variance less for women than for men. There are also other stats in that table – the significance of income and education. As expected, these are also more significant for women seeking men than the other way around. No one is saying these things don’t matter, but all of these unchangeable factors together explain less than 50% of the variance. It is well within the reach of the average man to overcome all of the expectations through style, confidence, personality, etc. –Lee

Lee says:

@Zhelyazko This is from the 2005 version of the paper, page 19: The results from several regressions are displayed in table 5.2. Focusing on ¯rst contact
e-mails outcome variable, the full set of user attributes explains 29% of the outcome vari-ability for men, and 44% of the outcome variability for women. “Looks” has the strongest explanatory power (31% for women and 19% for men), while income and education, if used as the only regressors, explain only a much smaller fraction of the outcome variance.

In other words, looks have 60% more explanatory power for men browsing women than for women browsing men. More importantly, all attributes explain only 29% of the variance for men and 44% of the variance for women. In other words, there is less that women can do to change their situation through external factors.

Look at the little online dating experiment posted by KL in the forums. He is not a tall guy. Without his height posted. He got three responses out of 19 sent messages. With his height posted, he got zero. When he replaced his boring photos with photos of himself with girls, he got four responses even with his height posted. These are not large sample statistics but they are plausible. So much of the variance is unexplained that simply changing a few items strategically makes up for most shortcomings. That’s what we call game.

–Lee

Cameron says:

OMG LEE ENOUGH WITH THE FUCKING MATHS ALREADY!!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD MAKE IT STOP!!!!!

Lee says:

@Cameron Zhelyazko asked, dude! I am only providing what others have asked for. Give me your address and I will send you a little four function pocket calculator so you can practice your multiplication tables :-)

Cameron says:

Lee, I’m too cool for calculators bro, I do it all in my head to show how smart I am :-)

Daddy says:

I had about 8 conversations with attractive women this morning and I got one phone number from a hot blonde! Just one question though. After I got a phone number, I started another conversation with this really hot brunette but she seemed standoffish. I didn’t bother trying to get her number. Was that the right move or should I have went for it anyway? Also, there is this girl that sits next to me in choir that I flirt with. Just from talking to her she seems very sheltered. She is cute, and I am always looking at her legs and ass. I want to have sex with her just once, but I am sure she is a virgin. I would feel like a piece of shit if I took advantage of her(or maybe this is all in my head due to past morals because she is obviously attracted to me, and I’m sure we could have a good time whether we had sex or not). I think I should go for it, but I don’t want to hurt her. I am not afraid to get her number, in fact I thought about it today(those legs) but she has been so sheltered.

Paul says:

Daddy,

That’s great. I hope something comes out of it for you with the blonde.

I myself had conversations with two pretty attractive tall blonde’s today during my lunch break. One told me that she had a boyfriend. The other just put her back to me and walked away. She dropped a canister from the salad bar and used one of the tried and true PUA lines “see now that is why we cant have good things around” and she told me to screw off.

Then I went to a local Walgreens and started two conversations – one with a really thin but busty red head and the other with a really cute Asian gal. Both told me boyfriend.

Last night I was out and had conversations with four young ladies. Two told me I was too old for them. One told me boyfriend the other told me she was currently separated.

So Lee and Daddy, I try – its not whining my friends. I mean I approach and try, try, try. So do a ton of other guys. Its trying. What is so funny with this seduction community is that if you try and fail, you are a whiner or like a leper. If you try and succeed, you are positive and a good example of pickup in general. And that’s just plain bullshit.

Interesting paradox do you not think?

Daddy says:

Paul,
drop to 6 percent body fat and then try.

Daddy says:

I am thinking that instead of asking for their email address I might just ask for their number and then text them before calling them. Ask them to do something over the phone(not text), but texting seems to have replaced email. I ask for email and many people don’t even use it anymore. Facebook it seems.

Also, when you were in the conversation did you ask if she was single?(if you ask that or tell them you are flirting, I did this the other day as an experiment and each one of them told me they had a boyfriend) The conversations I had went like this(standing there like I’m the MAN! almost staring into her eyes like a laser beam)This woman was easily a 9 if not 9.5:

I blatantly stopped her as she was walking and asked her:
“Do you have a personality to match your looks because if you did then I’d say you are a gem, but on the other hand if you didn’t then we’ll have to get you some etiquette 101 classes or something.” I introduced myself as an asshole who pretends to be a nice guy. She said she was a smart alek, and I said something like:
“yeah, if you had your nails done up and I told you they looked pretty, but where did you buy them from the dollar tree?”

This whole time I was standing there firmly, but to my CORE I felt the vibes going out of my body that “I am claiming you, you will listen to what I have to say”.

I told her I enjoyed talking to her, and then I turned but turned back around, held out a notebook, asked her if she had email, then told her to write her email address down, and while she was writing I told her to write her number down.

You see Paul, I felt that that part about how my CORE being felt as I was talking to her is what made this work. Other women today rejected me by acting standoffish, but this girl didn’t. Had my core not been in place, she might well have rejected me.

Daddy says:

If my core wasn’t in place, she may still have been physically attracted to me but due to the vibes I would have put out like I used to, she would reject me. Not because she doesn’t want me physically, but because I would shoot myself in the foot very subtly.

Daddy says:

Again I will say it Paul. Quit complaining about this, go get plastic surgery(if you actually have an issue in this department), drop to six percent body fat, then pack on about 30 pounds of muscle. I’d be willing to bet that even if you made yourself look like Tom Cruise when he was younger, that due to not having your core in place, you may get checked out a lot more than what you are now, but you will still be in more or less the same place that you are in now. Don’t believe me, try it. If I was you and had this kind of a problem, that is exactly what I would do and I would pursue it with a vengeance knocking people who got in my way(calling me shallow) down so they would get out of my way.

Lee says:

@Paul The only interesting paradox is that you blame your failure on forces beyond your control rather than you just plain all out sucking at this. Guess which I suspect is the cause?

Daddy says:

Paul,
try a different approach. If the ones you are using don’t work, try different ones until you find one that does.

Cory Skyy says:

I would like to invite you to join me for a FREE tele-conference call next week, December 12th at 6pm EST.

This is going to be one of those calls you do NOT want to miss out on.

I have invited a special guest to speak on this call with me. This guy has been a huge inspiration to me and has developed a magnetic personality that naturally draws women to him everywhere he goes. His name is Steve; which is the guy in the article above.

I have also invited several other guys that have applied my teaching that went from your average Joe to now living a life full of beautiful women they once never thought possible for them.

We will be talking about their journey and how they got to where they are today and even go into some things that you can do personally to begin getting the results you want with women; then we will open the call up for question and answer where you will be able to ask me and other guys any questions you have.

Date: Monday, December 12th
Time: 6pm EST

Dial-in: 1-712-432-3066
Conference code: 609955

Zhelyazko says:

Hi Cory

Will the call be recorded, if i am busy at the time; to listen to it later.

jonas says:

Seriously Lee? You work at a university with 34 Nobel Prize winners, looks is 70 % of the game. So stop attacking Paul.

Lee says:

@jonas It’s Paul who’s implicitly attacking the integrity of all of the guys who are on here with stories of their success as a result of game. Men who didn’t get taller, didn’t get better looking, and didn’t become rich overnight are finding success with game and reporting it here. But people like you and Paul aren’t listening. You just keep repeating the same old tired line. It’s all about looks. 70%? Where did you get that figure? Here’s a paper that uses over 10,000 individual preferences to quantify how much of a woman’s interest in a man is explained by looks:

http://www.aeaweb.org/assa/2006/0106_0800_0502.pdf

It’s 38%. Looks and income explain 41%. Looks, income, and education explain 42%. All factors combined explain 49%. That leaves quite a lot of room for game, Jonas. But you’re not going to listen to hard facts, are you? You’re just going to pull 70% out of your ass. Pathetic.

Eric Disco says:

Does Lee have an advantage that other guys don’t? He certainly does. But guess what? We all have advantages that other guys don’t.

If a guy wants to believe that it’s impossible, he’ll find a way to believe it. And he’ll try to get others to confirm his reason for failure.

“Well, what about a guy who doesn’t have X? It’s impossible for him,” he’ll say.

You show him evidence that a guy who doesn’t have X does well.

“Yeah, but what about a guy who doesn’t have X and Y. There’s no way.”

So you show him evidence that a guy who doesn’t have X and Y does well. Now he wants to see a guy who doesn’t have X, Y and Z. Unless some person has the perfect combination of challenges, then no one could possibly have it as hard as him.

A guy could be short, facially unattractive, bald, with a huncback, working a menial job, living in a broom closet in a rural town.

“Yes, but does he have a speech impediment? I have a speech impediment which is why I can’t succeed.”

There’s always a reason for failure.

Take any guy who’s successful with women and you could find some advantage he has that other guys don’t have. We all have that. A guy would be a fool not to use his advantage to help him out.

But the point here is that those seeming advantages are only a part of the equation–a much smaller part of the equation than guys realize. And most guys carry that lack of realization into every interaction with women, believing that they’re being judged for their looks the way they judge women.

Eric

Blake says:

Building on the last two posts above, here is a 48 minute presentation sexual attraction in both males and females. It says that the two most prominent female sexual cues are confidence and competence, NOT looks, muscles or large penises.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-A8GvUehq4

It’s a pretty interesting video and was a little eye opening for me to watch.

mettaworldpeace says:

The fact is that being successful with women depedds on who your going for. Guys like paul will always lose because their mindset is always on losing. As long as you think something is impossible, it is. But if you make up your mind that your goal is to bed her, your chances rise exponentially.

Guys like paul want to rationalize till their cheeks are blue, but don’t want to risk the initial pain and heartbreak we all go though when learning the art of pickup. You can certainly compare it to a martial art: practice makes perfect. One has to invest in loss to get anywhere. That may mean the first 100 girls you talk to you blow out with. The funny thing is that getting rejected on a regular basis makes you more immune to rejection and thus makes you willing to take risks, which is a big part of getting women: taking the risks.

Looks are a cop-out. Some guys are naturals. We can’t deny that. So why is that stopping you from getting off your big ass and exercisingapproaching the lovely tens and taking them to paradise? its just part of the learning curve. One day, after all your work approaching, it’ll just click. Then you’re the natural. But there is a learnig curve, and a harsh one at that.

Cconfidence is born from perseverace. Are you going to be that chode that makes 5 million excuses, or are you going to go out there and take blows?

Mettaworld baby.

dave says:

Mettaworldpeace – Sounds like you and Lee have had a lot of friends who happened to be female. That seems to be a common denominator
in the points that you both bring to the table. Is there a correlation between having female friends, and therefore, “practice” in simple, everyday conversation with the opposite sex that helps?

cat song Youtube says:

When I initially commented I appear to have clicked the -Notify me when new
comments are added- checkbox and from now on each time a comment is added I receive four emails with the same comment.
Is there a way you can remove me from that service?

Kudos!

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