How a Guy can know when a Girl is Interested

by Eric Disco
Mar 15


This post is from Josef via Reddit.

I’m a gay man, and I think that’s why I’ve been able to notice these so well. I made this post so hopefully more guys can see it.

How a guy can know when a girl is interested:

  • If you’re talking to a cashier and she tells you for any reason when she gets off work, she wants you to come back.
  • If a girl gives you her number, on some level she is interested. Meaning she gives it to you without you prompting her first, though often if she gives it to you after you ask her it still means she’s interested.
  • If a girl repeatedly mentions how she wishes she had a nice guy to date, she is interested.
  • If a girl asks about your relationship status out of the blue, she is interested.
  • If a girl you don’t know approaches you and asks for the time, but then lingers in your vicinity, she wants you to come back up and approach her because she is interested.
  • If a girl who is not a best-friend type suggests watching a movie when you two are hanging out alone, she wants something to happen. She is interested.
  • If a girl says she “needs to talk to you”, but then it ends up being something really stupid like “I don’t know what colour to dye my hair”, then she probably chickened out of telling you she likes you.
  • Physical touching while a girl is having a conversation with you usually means she is interested.
  • Any time a girl seems to giggle WAY more than she should during a conversation, it means she is interested.
  • If a girl you’re not very close friends with mentions the fact she broke up with her ex and is looking for someone new, by God make a move! She is interested. This could mean it’s just a rebound relationship, but nonetheless she’s interested
  • sergebirault.fr8A girl almost never talks about wanting a one night stand to a guy unless she wants to with him. (This is more on the topic of sex than dating, but I thought I’d include it anyway)
  • This one blows my mind that some guys miss! If a girl asks to sit next to you somewhere where there are other viable empty places/tables to sit at, she’s interested!
  • If a girl starts talking about “how well you two get along”, she is interested in you.
  • If a non-best friend girl is with her friends and ditches them to hang out with you, she is interested in you.
  • If a girl tells you she’s lonely at home (by means of text, E-Mail, FaceBook, phone, etc. etc.), she wants you to come over! She most likely is interested in you!
  • If a girl says she’s really cold in an obviously warm environment, she probably wants you to warm her up (either through a hug or occasionally offering your jacket chivalrously). She’s interested in you.
  • If a girl starts complaining about how all the guys just want her for sex, and that she wishes she had a sweet guy, she’s interested in you. However, I can’t guarantee she’d really be the type most guys would want to date. At the same time, this can be one of the few less obvious hints, where she is testing how you react and judging your answer to see if you’re someone she’s interested in.
  • If a girl says she’s “new in town” and wants someone to show her around, nine times out of ten it’s because she’s trying to find an excuse to be around you one on one.
  • If a girl seems to be smiling with you way more than she does when she talks to other people, she’s interested in you.
  • I know it’s cliche, but a lot of girls still twirl their hair when flirting. Girls usually stop doing this by the time they’re 21.
  • A girl who keeps beating herself up on her looks, not only is she fishing for a compliment, she’s fishing for YOUR compliment. Though this usually means she’s interested in you, she could just be looking for attention. If she does it often to multiple people, it’s probably the latter.
  • sergebirault.fr2In most contexts, if a girl asks you how her outfit looks, she wants you to check her out. She is interested in you.
  • If a girl talks about how long she spent getting ready and then asks your opinion on how she looks, she did it to impress you. (If she does this when you and her had specifically made plans to hang out, it’s even more explicit. Exceptions to this rule are weddings, parties, etc. etc.)
  • Girls like confidence. If you think a girl is interested in you, go for it! The worst that happens is a no. If she has a worse reaction, she’s someone you wouldn’t want to be around anyway.
  • If a girl is constantly leaving you to talk very briefly to her other female friends, then runs back to you to talk more. She is interested in you and is filling them in on all the details. This is especially true if it’s accompanied by a lot of smiling.

Disclaimer: It’s impossible to know if these are always true in every situation, but from my experience they are true. Please don’t shoot me in the face if some turn out not to work for you.


posted in Attraction, Sex and Escalation

120 responses
Josef says:

Thanks for posting these! It’s awesome to see someone else enjoy something I wrote.

Boris says:

All these situations seem very logical to me at this moment. Though somehow, when it really matters, I turn out to be very blind to the signs.

Mark says:

Great list. It’s amazing how many guys miss these.

Cameron says:

I would add:

- If she adds you on Facebook, shes interested
- If you stop talking and she moves to continue the conversation, shes interested

Socialkenny says:

Great post as Josef said.
How ironic that just today,after chatting up a random girl,she asked me about my LTR status.
Usually when a girl asks me about my relationship,I brush it off as nothing.

Imsoclueless says:

Wow this girl does alot of these sign man im blind ty for these signs it helped alot n yes i do like her but idk if she the type i wanna be with

Cameron says:

If shes doing a lot of these signs, then shes almost certainly into you, just go for it dude! To hell with what she thinks!

Imsoclueless says:

Well i do like her. Her birthday is this friday on april first she told me n stuff. We were also in class and i sit with two other girls and her we were talking about movie it was a scary one called insiduos sumthing like that and she was like oo i wanna go see that movie but im not 100% sure she likes me but i think she does anyway i didnt say anything after that i wasnt sure if i should tell her lets watch it. i think it comes out on her birthday but idk if i should ima just see what happens this week i might ask her. Btw i heard it better when a girl breaks the touch barrier she broke it she’s playfully hits me when we talk because i over slept n didnt go to skool or i left a class early. She aslo tells me lets get to class and lightly pushes me into our class room. Btw im 17 and shes 16

boomer says:

cameron you said “if she adds you on facebook, shes interested”

this can’t apply on all that many situations can it? I mean if I have a party every now and then, lets say every second weekend and she comes as a “friends friend” afew times. you hang out abit but your not really talking one on one verry much and then after 2-3 parties she adds you… can that really mean she is interested? is it not more like you have met afew times and are starting to be somewhat friends or so?

would like respons on this couse i find myself in that situation ALOT :D

Cameron says:

Hey boomer,

Yeh it was just a generalisation bro, it doesnt necessary mean shes attracted to you because she adds you on FB, I like to assume that she is though, cause that means Im more likely to try and get somewhere with her (if I’m into her) rather than assuming shes just being friendly and missing out on an opportunity.

Lucy says:

Being a woman myself, I think you are pretty much correct. Although some signs could mistaken for being interested when a woman is just being friendly, speaking for myself, if I am romantically interested in someone I will make sure I am much closer to them than normal and do the ‘accidentally on purpose’ touching thing, like a hug etc. I’m not a touchy feely person generally so I;d do it only with someone I am interested in. Otherwise Id make sure to stand a normal distance apart when talking and not touch at all and give a handshake when saying goodbye etc. Hope that made sense.

Tamman says:

I can’t say any of these “indicators” have ever happened to me. yay.

Rick says:

I’m a 24 year old guy, never had a gf, except for a one week dating stint where nothing much happened. It feels to me that I’ve never come across any of these signs ever, or am I just not picking them up. I’m a great guy, a bit quiet but very social once I meet everyone and get relaxed at a party, love to have fun, smart too. None of this seemed to help in this way, even when I’m surrounded by lots of women in Toronto, Canada. There’s this girl I’m interested in and I kinda pick up on some signs but they’re extremely subtle, I may even be misinterpreting them as friendliness which is what I get alot. The friend zone is an all too familiar place, its like limbo, between heaven and hell. Never got much physical contact from this girl but when we talk one on one she smiles alot, continues conversation when I wouldn’t talk with laughs here and there. I guess it takes a bit of time too, and I should ask her out for coffee or something when I see her next week.

Lee says:

@Rick It doesn’t take much time for a girl to express an interest in you. It takes minutes. If this has been going on between you for a while, you are probably already in friend zone. I don’t know how much you can do to change your dynamic with this girl, but you should definitely consider learning to meet women. There is a gradual approach to improving your game that will eventually put a stop to these ambiguous friendships. You will be either friends or romantic prospects, but never in between. Having more options will also help you make better decisions with respect to which girls are worth pursuing. –Lee

Random guy says:

I’m 17 and I’ve never had a girlfriend. I never really did care though. For some years I was quite socialy akward, and didn’t go much outside. I did after some time, but people judged me to much on my physical apperance. (I’m not one of the most prettyest ones). So I went back being at home in my room, being socialy akward. Of that, I began sleeping alot, because I had alot of problems. To cut that whole story short: I had to go to a kind-of-hospital to be better, and to follow therapie etc. Now…There was this girl, I mean extremely beautiful. We hitted it off very good. I mean we exchanged numbers the first day, and she even added me on facebook then. At the table she always wanted to sit next to me, or me next to her. She also invited me to watch a movie with her, and the first time she lay down on my lap, and holded my hand. Also, when we went home for some days, she constantly texted me, saying she misses, me, and all others. She always hugged me. When we were signed of from the hospital, we met up only once (the day after..) and after that she texted faar less, and texted far different aswel. Now, after some time I had to go back, because of some reasons, and she didnt. The last week I stayd at the hospital she was there aswel, and we hitted it off great aswel. We hugged, and she always kissed me on the cheeck (she also did that before btw). She also wrote me 2 letters saying i’m one-of-a-kind guy, but my friend said she only sees me as a “friend”. I’m having a hard time with that. After I went out the hospital (4weeks now) we didnt meet-up and she, we, haven’t texted for 2weeks. We had some fights some weeks ago on txt, because I had the feeling i’m just a friend for her. Now my question is: Did she didn’t tex for 2weeks now because she wants to play hard 2 get? or because she realy doesn’t like me anymore? Was she ever in-love with me? or Still is? (She also hugs alot of other guys btw, but she said i’m the only one she treats “special)

What do you guys think? Sorry for the long message.

Alexander says:

@Random Guy…..I’ve never had just a friend hold my hand, kiss me all the time and for damn sure never lay her head in my lap. After weeks of her throwing herself at you with above and beyond signs, she may be over waiting on you to man up and pull the trigger. Invite her over and CLOSE the deal *at the very least kiss and make out with her*. The longer you wait, the worse her opinion gets of you and the more cemented you become as one of her ‘friends she hugs alot’ aka orbiters. Don’t shoot yourself in the foot like i used to doing the same thing.

Anthony L says:

I wanted to know whats the “best friend type” cause i know a friend who has these sign but she turned him down and she calls em Bestie or bestfriend ..why wud she show these signs?

KJE says:

Iv had girls bump into me and hit me playfully. But I never really took notice. Ppl say I flirt a lot and I guess I do. When I do like a girl tho I don’t flirt I get shy. I’m a freshman and would like advice. And the girl I like came up to me and asked if I thought her friend was hot. I said ya but didn’t make a big deal about it. There’s a lot of girls at my school that playfully hit and do thos sorts of things.

FYI iv had girls that r friends lay on me before at a drive in movie. Do just adding on to what you said earlier.

Derrick says:

Awesome article. I bookmarked this on my phone so I can refer to it before I go out for the day. says:

“This one blows my mind that some guys miss! If a girl asks to sit next to you somewhere where there are other viable empty places/tables to sit at, she’s interested!”

-More than likely she has just experienced a traumatic event and finds you familiar or she doesn’t want to be where she is. She probably doesn’t find you the least bit attractive sexually or have any interest – in fact the opposite – like a therapist, cousin, brother or father. Anyone who is dealing with another person with anxiety ought to be very mindful of this.

Also, gay men, should be very mindful of female, straight friends who say and do all of the aforementioned points. Evolved ones have absolutely no interest in you. They think of you like brothers and talk to you like they would their sister or a girlfriend. You may groom yourself well, but if she is an evolved woman, she has turned off the part in her brain and body that would establish any sexual connection between you and her. Most likely, the thought of a sexual connection between her gay friend and her, is vial, because it would be such a violation to you. This is not because she finds you ugly but because she would feel violated if the shoe were one the other foot. This is why the relationship works, because she trusts you because there is no sexuality.

I think you’re article could make gay men very paranoid against straight women.

Gera727 says:

Well I’m in a dilemma cause this girl I kno and like considers me her best friend but she shows quite alot of these signs my question for whom ever is How do I get myself out of the blasted FRIEND ZONE!!!!

Joe says:

So I met this girl a few days back, we hung out with friends one day and then the next day (Sunday), I did some homework for a few hours with her and a few other friends. Recently we were asking each other random questions and she asked what I look for in a girl, and before I went to bed she told me that I’m really cool and it seems like we’ve known each other for much longer.. does this mean ANYTHING? Also once in the hall she saw me and hugged me really tightly. I really like her; we get along really well but I think she has a boyfriend so, yeah, lemme know what you think. Thanks!

Cameron says:

Yes, shes into you Joe.

“she told me that I’m really cool and it seems like we’ve known each other for much longer.”

This is girlcode for “I like you”.

Joe says:

Thank you, Cameron! Any tips on what to do? I don’t think I should do anything really because of her boyfriend.. I guess ill just keep hanging out with her. Maybe she didn’t mean it like that when she said that.

Cameron says:

Well she was into you when she said it…..its kinda complicated because she has a boyfriend though, she might not be into you anymore or be into you but want to stay faithful to her boyfriend.

Joe says:

I see.. damn complications :P I’ll just wait then. She also never mentions her boyfriend I realized. In the hall I just asked her where she was going and she said she was waiting.. (for him). and earlier someone asked about him when i was talking to her and she said she wasnt obsessed with him or anything and they really only see each other generally once a week outside of school. Uh well thanks for the help. Im always liking the unavailable girls, what’s wrong with me

Cameron says:

Dude, shes available, just sack up and go for it.

Joe says:

I am going for it! Trying to atleast :D

O.J. says:

There’s this girl I like, but I’m not sure if she feels the same.
There was a time I didn’t see her for two months because I had to train for an international tourny. On the day before I left, I went to my college and she saw me. She was surprised to see me and she said to me “I haven’t seen you in such a long time” and she gave me a hug. She then wished me luck when I had to leave.
When I won medals from the tourny, I posted it all over FB. I had over 100+ likes from the posts and so many congrats from my friends. But I got neither from her. When I went to visit my college again, I saw her again. She congratulated me personally and gave me a hug.
I really like this girl, but I don’t know if she feels the same. Most of my friends tell me she most likely does, and some tell me she’s just being friendly.

Lee says:

@O.J. You’ll never know what she’s thinking until you start to escalate. I don’t know if you have any experience escalating, so it might no be that easy for you to do. There are some articles on this site about physical and verbal escalation. Briefly, escalation is the process of putting women into situations in which they are comfortable only if they are genuinely attracted to you – flirty, sexy conversations with lots of touching. Good luck to you and post your questions to the Forums section of this site so we can discuss them in greater detail. –Lee

Greg says:

I saw an old flame that i let slip through my fingers yesterday. and today she msg me on face book saying “i cant believe i saw you today! such a surprise :]” what should my reply be to let her know im interested but not come on to strong?

Greg says:

cant believe I saw you yesterday*

Lee says:

@greg “well, if you like surprises, we can repeat the experience. wait. that won’t work because it won’t be a surprise :-) i have an idea. let’s agree to meet for coffee at but then forget who we’re meeting! deal?”

Mike Johnson says:

Bogus list… I read this list and noticed three “signs” and when I asked her out I was promptly rejected.

Swoop says:


Seeing a couple signs (especially some of the weaker ones) and then not having instant success doesn’t mean the list is bogus, it means there’s still work to do, you’ve just gotta keep creating this attraction in women and keep going for it.

GlennP says:

Lee… I love you but I have to disagree with your text. Here are the reasons.

First- Going for the hangout with an old flame so quick will definitely show signs of neediness. The last thing you want an old flame to think is that you are desperate or needy for her attention in any way or to eager to reconnect. She should be under the impression that your life is awesome and filled with plenty of women since you’ve last saw each other.

Secondly- She’s obviously chasing to a degree and is more than likely “just” feeling the situation out. She sets the bait and if he nibbles on her hook he’s more than likely out! She’s still capable of being gamed of course because she is reaching out but here’s your chance to reel her in hardcore. Bait her! I would imagine this guys game has gotten better since he’s decided to study dating advice. He might as well use it.

Third- My first response to her would have been… “Wait? Were you stalking me??? On a scale of 8-10 how hot did I look?” The explanation of this should be quite obvious. And then after she responds… WAIT to respond back. Play hard to get but still let her think you’re attainable.

Fourth- Your text goes against the exact advice this guy is asking for. He said “what should my reply be to let her know im interested but not come on to strong?” By going for the hangout so quick is going to be somewhat strong. And by sending my text he’s letting her know that he’s flirting with her which in her eyes could be taken as a sign of interest but will still leave her with the question.. Is he interested?

Fifth- Don’t really have a fifth! lol

But seriously no disrespect to Lee. He’s a cold blooded killer. Just wanted to put in my two cents… Well in this case 4 cents!

Head coach for BradP

Lee says:

Lurker! I think you may be right. One more banter text before asking her out. –Lee

GlennP says:

I’m the “Lurkiest guy ever!”

affi says:

So what would it mean if you have talked to a girl about deep things then snuggle up with her on the sofa, walk her halfway home, then dont see her for another two weeks. When she sees you she gives out signs like crazy, you talk to her more, share a long hug and hold it for a bout 20 seconds and then when shes about to go, give her a kiss, talk to her on facebook telling her she looked nice the next day you saw her by surprise, and she wont respond to any of your two post. does she still like me?

Marvin says:

I sent a friend request to a girl I used to like a long time ago, and she added me. Talked to her and she explained she wasnt very good at using Facebook. I tole her it’s cool and asked her a question and she answered with a smiley face. After she said she will keep in touch. I said ok night. Should I send her my number and tell her that I’m not a big facebooker and she can contact me better

Alex_B says:


sounds like she gave you at least 2 opportunities to make a big move and you let the ball drop. However, you giving her a non friendly hug and a kiss helped (was it on the lips or on the cheek?)

But yea she probably was disappointed you didn’t make a move yet. Women like to see strength and when you don’t TRY to sleep with them they wonder what’s wrong with you. Getting another opportunity once you’ve screwed it up is rare. I had to learn this the hard way.

It’s probably a good idea to pull back a little. If you’ve contacted her twice and she hasn’t gotten back to you then let it be until she comes to you, like Lee or Eric advises. Don’t keep contacting her a third time. She probably still like you but you are in damage control mode and chasing her without her putting in effort will only make her attraction plummet because it looks like you know you fucked up and need to redeem yourself. Check out some of Lee’s input on the forum, he has great examples of how to handle this kind of situation

Gera727 says:

Does anyone know how to get out of the friend zone???

Lee says:

@Gera727 I can tell you, but if you’re in the friend zone, you’re not going to do it. You’ll do it with someone, but not this girl, maybe the 20th girl you’re interested in after this one. The key to never getting into the friend zone is escalation, both physical and verbal. First, touching her to punctuate your sentences. Then hugging her when she says something you like or you two agree about. Then putting your arm around her when you are hanging and talking. In terms of verbal escalation, bringing up stories of dating, cheating, sex. Talking about fantasies. Guys who are good at this do it in the first five minutes of meeting a woman. This does two things. First, it demonstrates balls, which gets more attraction from women who are already attracted to them. Second, it makes women who are not attracted to them uncomfortable, and they quickly end the interaction… which is exactly what a man should want. –Lee

MrAntiquity says:

Lee–I”ve been thinking about this ‘friend zone’ thing for ages–

and the more I think about the more I’m not sure it even exists.

I’ve known lots of guys who somehow end up sleeping with tons of their friends. And I’ve seen other guys who never touch anyone. The difference is deliberate ambiguity. People who are by nature sexual beings will often–almost by accident–easily segue into actual sex with friends, because it’s a completely natural progression. However, if sexuality is a psychological block to the person, then the guy has effectively emasculated himself–meaning that the normal sexual flow that one sees in, say, animals–can’t happen.

“Just friends’ is social code for an interruption in the sexual flow between two people, in my opinion, which quickly gets overridden by social convention. Maybe I”m way off base, but I’ve felt that way for a long time.

Lee says:


Funny you say that because I’ve had exactly the opposite experience. When attraction exists from the start but, for some reason, cannot be resolved in a sexual encounter, it can exist for a long, long time. What I’ve almost never seen is the opposite – someone who’s never had that attraction (or briefly had it then lost it) transitioning to a relationship in which he is attractive to a woman and can leverage that attraction into a relationship. Through former pickup students, friends, and people on this site, I have literally hundreds of example of the former – lost attraction that is never regained – and maybe a handful of examples of the latter – attraction discovered or restored much later in a relationship. This is, in fact consistent with many of the quantitative sociology experiments performed to illuminate the subject of attraction. As far as we can tell, it occurs almost at the instance that two people first see each other, but can be lost at any time. If you want me to post some links, I will. –Lee

MrAntiquity says:


slightly crossed wires here–I think we’re actually in agreement.

I’m not talking about turning a non-sexual relationship around or having attraction just show up at a later time. I agree with you that the door can be closed. But I think that has a lot to do with the guy unwittingly de-sexualizing the relationship. As you suggest, there are lots of guys who keep the sexual window open but dont necessarily escalate–these are couples who generally ‘haven’t hooked up’ but ‘could’, despite what they may tell themselves.

I do think that even in the ‘just friends’ case, the sexual avenue can be re-opened, but usually it’s at a level that’s too latent and buried too deeply for either party to tap into.

Lee says:


You know what I see a lot? Men who lose the initial attraction they generate by failing to take action. Women are very good at detecting interest tempered by fear. That’s one way that men fall into the friend zone. Another way is when women gradually discover that they no longer need to fight for a man’s interest – that it is there for them, no matter what else they do. I think I’ve seen more relationships – both new and long term – fall apart due to this dynamic than due to cheating, fighting, or bad sex.


Carl888 says:

“If you want me to post some links, I will. –Lee”

I’d be interested in these links. Can you post them?


Harry says:

Haha !!!! mate just to add something to the article…….. its always damn complicated about the girls but on the other hand MEN ARE SIMPLE !!!!! with the girls its always these friend zone romantic zone and stuffs but for us its very binary just 2 words Interested or Not Interested !!!!!

Vard9 says:

Guys face it even if u pock up on the signs u still need to make the right move to get her any way so it would be good if the page was updated to have some suggestions about how to move in on the girl and seal the deal. ;p

John says:

Thanks for posting this. Earlier this evening, I had a girl who worked at a sandwich shop tell me when she got off work, but she did it in a subtle enough way that I couldn’t quite tell if it was an invitation or not. It was something like, “I started at 11 this morning. I usually work until 6, but today I’m here until 8.” It was nestled within extraneous information, so at the time I interpreted it as just making conversation. But now that I think of it, she had no particular reason to tell me any of that.

Also, she was acting a bit flirty in general.

And no, I didn’t go back at 8. I went straight from the sandwich shop to a movie that didn’t get out until after 9. And I didn’t put two and two together until I was sitting in the theater. Hopefully I’ll be less clueless next time.

Gareth says:

Hi to explain my situation I have to backtrack and I apologise in advance. When i was younger i used to hang about with a group that were around my age to a considerable amount older than me.. The younger lot myself included were looked after by the older lot. Anyway as time goes by the older lot pass on what they know and their ways to the younger lot. But some of the younger lot twisted the ‘teachings’ and were vile mean and torturous to the new younger lot. I although being fast and agile not exactly strong and only mildly popular among the new older lot elected myself to be one of the few defenders of the new youngsters. (Got into fights a lot). Anyway while looking after the younger lot there was a specific group that clung to me like a tramp on a sandwich. As i grew older and as did they i started hanging around less and less now that i knew they wouldn’t be messed with I felt my work was done. My sister started going down more and more. And on one occasion that I went down with her. I saw a few of my old friends that i’d looked after. Many of which were happy to see me and question where I’d been e.t.c. But the one who was closest to me throughout those days didn’t say a word to me. A couple of minutes into our reunion I confronted her she simply walked away. I asked one of our mutual friends if they knew the reasoning behind her behaviour. They simply said, ‘she missed you, she loved you, you left’ and those words haunt me. Anyway skip 2 years down the line. The bond me and said girl had is stronger than ever. Whenever i turn up she makes sure even before my older friends and friends that i have known longer that she is the first to get a hug and literally jumps on me and clings to me i hold her up by her ass and she couldn’t care less. She cut’s in queue after already having been given a hug while I am ‘doing the rounds’ hugging everyone else (a lot of friends is a burden at times) she cuts in to get another intimate hug this time a rest head on shoulder. And after I am done she insists on another hug where her hands stoop to one aprox 3 inch above my ass and on aprox half inch above that. She will hold me tight like this for a while. Then daily events unfold. During the day there are several occasions where she will make sexual remarks at me (despite being pure [i hate the word virgin pure sounds so much more polite] and wanting to be til she’s married which is fine by me) she also makes inviting gestures at me to come between her legs. She doesn’t even extend these invites to her bf. Now about her BF: Younger less energetic version of myself, with one other difference, He ignores her frequently and although I like the guy it pisses me off. I want to tell her how I feel and Will be in a couple of days. The Dilemma I am stuck with isn’t how do I go about it. as any woman I have tried to woo i have succeded . My Dilemma is before I make my feelings known, properly I am having trouble determining, does she just see me as a big bro or does she see more. I am hoping from what I have said that you guys with your infinite albeit varied and eclectic wisdom will be able to help me. She always laughs and smiles at everything i do (then again most people do esp girls). And constantly is near me whenever I am around. (although that might be because of the way things were).
I do get pissed off though because it always seems that the girls I fall for are younger than me (she’s 17 I’m 22 (23 7 days before she is 18 not that it is an issue for me I don’t want sex I want her and even If I did hey she’s legal ;P ), and with that comes a certain amount of patience, unknowing and the inevitability of heartbreak, or am i being too cynical? Any thoughts greatly appreciated

Zhelyazko says:

Go for what you want. The worst regret is not doing anything…

Chris says:

You sir, deserve an award.

Gareth says:

really why? and zhelyazko thanks good advice

egysky says:

so what about a girl who was happy with a guy for 3 days and they did very nice things during these 3 days and full of romantic moments and then the girl asked him to be only a friends because the relation went so quick for her and she doesn’t feel ready to have a serious relation, although the guy went away and was sad as for him he couldn’t accept being just a friend with the one he feel something with and can’t stop himself touching her or kissing her when he see her as he used to do during these 3 days and actually she is the one who used to come to him and holding his hand and kiss him before, now the guy he went away and he left the whole group of us and don’t want to see this girl any more, the girl is still asking about him every day and trying to make him understand that he can be a friend as she needs every thing to be slowly but he doesn’t accept it as he says that what has started with feelings and love can’t be ended this way , may be it would be easier if it was only a friendship first and then it turned to be sex but the fact that they were attracted to each other from the first day and they had 3 nights and days all together happily and exchanging great feelings is making it hard for him to accept as well she just stands behind the idea of being only friends and meeting every day??? me as a friend with others we couldn’t find out who is wrong and who is right, and as well we couldn’t help them out to get back again or find a mid point…any one can advice us now with what they think ?? and specially any one can tell us why the girl she did this?? and is it still in love really with him or she has just changed her mind? and if the boy is wrong when he said that he can’t see her if he has to be only a friend after what they have had together, also the fact that she was always telling him how happy she is and how he see her not happy now when he is around??

roli says:

hey so there is this girl at school…and we are getting along well…we kissed some time ago but we didn’t get into a relationship…now are are friens but lately she’s been smileing a lot to me and asked me to arrange her hat when there was a friends of her who coul do it…does it mean she likes me?

Dale says:

He is right to have nothing to do with her. At best he is in the “friend” zone, and at worst: well, I went through a coupe of years of hell with a girl like that.

vusi says:

nyc storys guys.but my problem seem to be dffrnt ,the issue is that non of the girls im into do these sign and the girls doin em are ugly and i hate em.maybe you cn let another 17 from zim

egysky says:

Thanks Dale, what’s new : This boy he burnt her up actually, she was travelling with one of her friends for a long trip and the guy spent with us this evening before they travel and at the end he just left away after greeting her friend and wishing her a nice trip but he didn’t even give a look at his girl and he just left all of us after greeting us all except her and just turned back home. What was good to see is this girl after he has left………….. she was all red and doing some strange moves and started to talk loudly asking why he did this and where is the love and kisses and all…next day she flew away very sad and didn’t speak at all, she told him once that she is very stubborn person but I think he was the rock who broke the stubborn person inside her.

Ogando says:

Ive made out with this girl a couple of times we text we talk etc.. But sometimes hard to talk to her when we’re out with a group of friends, but is fine with me around her friends, what would you make of this.

Ogando says:

Hry guys Ive made out with this girl a couple of times we text we talk etc.. But sometimes hard to talk to her when we’re out with a group of friends, but is fine with me around her friends, what would you make of this.

Johnybravo says:

you are crazy, lol

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Selena says:

So I was reading a few of these and NOW i understand why so many guys think that I am into them. Like seriously I really didn’t think I was leading them on and none of them I actually even liked. Guys why don’t you just ASK the girl what’s going on??? it would just make things SO much easier, instead of assuming that she’s already into you…? haha boys boys boysssss ;)

Lee says:


Never. Ever. Ask a woman “what’s going on”. Escalate until she stops you. That is the only surefire way to know whether she’s into you.


MrAntiquity says:


No. That’s what keeps guys single. You know the phrase ‘it just happened’? It doesn’t just happen’ because some asks. The whole thing about sexuality is that it’s biological–emotional–non-verbal.

Sure, if someone really likes me, and I say ‘so you like me, huh?’ she’ll probably say yes. But in most cases that interest isn’t really confirmed in either person’s mind until something actually happens. Asking just gives the other person a chance to say know before giving themselves a chance to feel anything.

MrAntiquity says:

know = no (I hate typos)

MrAntiquity says:


Also–the guys who you say ‘think I am into them’—aren’t the kind of guys we’re trying to develop into. Those are people who just can’t read signals–generally can’t figure women out in general. Sure, they’ll try it on with tons of girls and eventually it’ll work.

What we’re talking about is different–when we say ‘assume attraction’ we mean ‘don’t deny our own sexuality.’ We’re guys, it’s ok to chat up, flirt with, hit on, and make moves on women without asking for verbal confirmation. If she says no at any point, we stop, pull back, maybe try again later, maybe move on to someone else.

But no asking for permission.

funnyfiend says:

ok so theres this girl in my class so like we where in class and in groups and we where talking and shes like why do u never look me in the eyes
2 she is always staring at me in class i seen her through the side of my eye
3 at lunch her and her friends are like right across from where we always are at
4 at pe her and friends where like looking at me and she came over like litterally stood right in front of me for a minute and im like hi and she just smiled and walked away
5 her friends always look at me when shes not looking and smile
6 she asked me for a piggy back ride in pe i was so shocked i didnt know if shes serious cause we are sophmores lol
7 when i got a bad haircut everyone was like it sucks and shes like its perfect i was like ummm

i was really nervous to like a approach cause at first i saw as just a friend but then it felt really different and then she didnt approach me so we didnt talk for a while but she still was looking at me in class and then like right now my friend posted something on facebook she commented and i commented right after she didnt say nothing else but a minute later she sent me a friend request do u think she likes me ?

jhon kenedy says:

What if you go to your freinds room for a visit. After conversation she says that the room is soo cold and holds her hand into your cheek? and say see my hand is cold?

Jhon kenedy

YPS says:

i gotta say this guy is awesome.
today i had an experience that keeps me asking myself the same question, would she be interested? here goes…
i work in a building which has a twin building 50 feet away, well the parking lot is common for both buildings, since i started (one year ago) working there i have noticed this white car parking next or at least two other cars next to me, well the driver is a good looking girl that i am crazy for having a word with, well there have been several situations where i could have establish a conversation with her but somehow i cannot get the approach.
it is weird a day where at the time i am leaving she is not around too preparing to leave. well today when i approached my car she was the other way coming too, but no way she didnt look to me, well i sat in my car, she sat in hers, i was staring at her to establish a conversation, never looked to me, but she twirl her hair, turned on her car, and lowered down the window, like letting me approach, but all this wihout looking to me. it is curious b/c in the last weeks she gets off at the same tiime i do. well, she looks betwen 25 and 30, i am 34 already.
i dont know, at this time after being there so many times to say hi it is no worth it to been rejected. not sure, but i want the approach.’
maybe she thinks i am stalking her, dont know.,

any comments greastly appreciated.
bye bye

Remy says:

In reply to YPS,
Don’t think, just approach and you will see what happens. If you have nothing to say just say hi! Most of the time I think it’s better to do something than nothing even if it’s something very small. It’s important to start somewhere.

Good luck and good courage too!
:) peace

Daniel S says:

Well… There’s this girl I like, but I’m not sure on what to do. Every time I see her she hugs me constantly, with her body pressed up close to mine. These hugs sometimes last 4-5 mins! When she sees me she leaves her friends to come over to see me, she walks very quickly towards me. Also she has started to hang out where I usually hang out. I’ve noticed that she stares at me alot but when I make eye contact she looks away quickly before looking back again. She’s asked me to meet up with her this weekend, so should I ask her out? I think I might.

Selena says:

@MrAntiquity yeah i see your perspective….
as a girl i do rely on nonverbal communication mostly true true. i guess guys annnndd girls just need to be careful about the signals they send cause sometimes they can get mixed:/
sometimes its the other way around for me. its like how many more hints can i drop until you get that i like you??? haha idk.

@Daniel she’s totally into you! she’s probably waiting for you to ask! :]

Javier de la Cruz says:

So Ive known this girl for a year now. We hang out few and far between. Recently though she’s been asking me to hang out even more often now to the point of every weekend. We have fun and she always says she haves fun with me and we should hang out more. All we do at the end is just hug btw.

Now she asked me to go away with her for a weekend trip to see some sights and she’ll pay for the hotel and what not. I asked her if she getting 1 hotel room or 2 and she said 1. Now I’m gonna go out on a limb here and assume that this girl is into me. Am I correct or am I reading into too much here???

Eric Disco says:

Hi Javier,

…All we do at the end is just hug btw. Now she asked me to go away with her for a weekend trip to see some sights and she’ll pay for the hotel and what not. I asked her if she getting 1 hotel room or 2 and she said 1. Now I’m gonna go out on a limb here and assume that this girl is into me. Am I correct or am I reading into too much here???

There is only one way to test whether a girl is ‘really’ into you: get sexual with her. At least try and make out with her. I would do this *before* I went on a trip with her. If you don’t, you are putting yourself in a bad position.

Ask yourself this: if you went on a trip with her and she didn’t want to get sexual with you, would you be angry? If so, then you need to iron that out beforehand. Never put yourself in a position to be angry at a woman. She doesn’t deserve that.


Gera727 says:

Just wanted to say thanks to you all because you all have helpful advice and I’m sure there are more guys like me that need to read this article and thanks once again hope you all have a wonderful day!!!!!! (^_^)

Rory says:

I’ve got a question I could use some advice with:

I’m 25 and a couple of months ago I went to Spain with my sister. In our hotel (full of old people) there was working a (for me) really hot waiter. I was head over heals the first time I saw him.
I started smiling at him etc, and I noticed that he looked at me back with a large smile (even when he was extremely busy serving other customers). 2 days before I left I wrote a tinny note (never spoke to him before, I don’t speak spanish) I managed to give to him in the bar, and he replied on it with his number and name (I’m very shy, and i still can’t believe I had the guts to do this, but I have never felt like this before, and I thought I would regret it the rest of my life if I didn’t know who he was. Anyway, that evening, he asked me out. And of course I said yes. So next evening, after his shift, we went out. The BEST night in my life, but also, that night we had to say goodbye cause I left in the early morning.
I was very emotional (and I normally don’t have any emotions) because of the fact I have never felt like this in my entire life (and I’ve had a really good long term relationship before.)

Back home, I felt devastated, could only think of one thing, finish what w’ve started (his words to). I got a couple of text messages of him asking that I would never forget him, and that ‘One day, his heart would be for me’.
Almost 2 weeks home, got a text from him on my birthday. and I booked a holiday back to Spain to see him on my own (very angry parents). Left the day after I booked. He didn’t knew I was coming back and when I arrived, he sad that day, he was so happy and emotional that he had never had this feeling in his entire life (according to me he ment it, because he seems to me as a very honest person, and I normally judge people right). So, to make a long week short. We spend every second that he didn’t had to work together, it was amazing (!). The last hours he said he loved me (!) and his last words where “study”.

He knew I had a ‘boyfriend’ I brook up with a month ago, but that guy never ment anything to me. I just used the guy to get over my long term relationship I ended myself because I choose my career above my personal love life. I knew I had to move to England to progress my career perspectives. The spanish guy asked me if I ever would see him again, and I sad no. But now I do see that guy again, and it’s clear when you look on fb that we do. But I kindof feel forced into it (I’m studying in england, and i don’t want to get my mind distracted by thinking of other guys, what normally happens if you are single, so I’m using this guy, I know that’s cruel…. I mean, I finally found the first person (the spanish guy) that I really loved and I would change my life plans for him. I can tell you, that’s mad to be me ! (I’m on my way to become an investment banker in london). On his side, he also had a one long term relationship 3 years ago, from a very rich spanish family. And I could tell that his heart would never would belong to someone who was ‘less’ then she ever ment to him. -> Same situation as me, with my long term relationship…

Okay. So 1 week later he send me a text ‘I think of you every day, you are very special for me’ And that’s it.. It has been 150 days now since I saw him. And I have texted him a couple of times, wrote on his fb, private fb messages,. No reply at all. And it hurts !!

I know he works 7/7 days between 8 and 10 hours a day, he only has a couple of hours of a week free, and only internet on his phone when he’s working. No time to go out with other girls, and if he has time he goes out with his close friends. He’s extremely popular in that city. So he actually has a social life (I guess).

Can anyone give me advice? Why did he stopped talking to me? Does he really likes me? Or did he just used me? I’m planning to go back, and I wonder if it’s a stupid idea.. (I’m studying madly to become fluent in Spanish lol).
My opinion: he stopped talking because he knows we can’t have a relationship because he’s living in Spain, and I’m studying (soon working) in London/England. I say this because of the fact that he said ‘one day my heart is for you’. Maybe he doesn’t want to get in the way of uni? And I assume he doesn’t want to ruin it ‘us togheter’, and rather waits for a couple of years so we can make this work…Or maybe I’m just way to optimistic, still…

I’m sorry if this is a pathetic story, I don’t know what to do really, can’t talk to anyone about it… Any help is welcome ! :)

GUYS, if this would be you, why would you react like this? Be honest

Rory says:

To Javier,

This girls is definitely in to you, no question about it. Just go for it, but only do it if you really want her to. I, as a girl, would only do this with a guy i like, and if I would do this with a guy I don’t want to get close with, I would clearly say something like ‘where just doing this as friends’.
Good luck, and have fun !

gopal says:

hey friends , i am stuc in an peculiar situation . i have a girl in my heart who had exchanged some serious eye contact and smiles with me an year ago …but i was not ready for anything back then now i am totally intrested in her and i have tried to talk to her when she is alone but i failed after looking negative facial expression she she thinks im kinda behinde her now …but i really wanna be with her please help me out with any good suggestions asap thank you in advance guys :-)

Rory says:

To Gopal,

My advice: When you see her, just really show that your happy to see her again, by giving her a massive smile (not in a freaky, scary way, but a worm welcome-ing smile) and just say something like ‘how your doing?’ and talk about your day/ your plans / nearby holiday if she wouldn’t reply a lot.

Smiling and making her feel welcome has a really strong effect on a girl ;)
Goodluck !

Lee says:


Your story is not pathetic. In fact, it happens all the time. But if the guy has not responded in nearly five months, what do you hope to get out of this? Are you looking for some way to fix it? Or do you just want to understand what happened?


Rory says:

@ Lee,

Thanks for you comment :)
I guess I want both. I think, if I keep showing up in his life as much as possible (2, maybe 3 times a year) then he will figure out that I really like him, and that he’s not a holiday crush that I forget. (I know I will never forget him, I’m that type of girl).

And I would like to know yes, why he doesn’t respond. I’ve got to say, on his fb, he has other girls chasing him, and he rarely responds to them (maybe 1/15 times and 3 words max). ANd somehow, I know that he likes me more…

I’m not looking for a relation right now, and neither is he, because we both have a very hectic (uni) & worklife, it just wouldn’t work at the moment because of that. And we would ruin the change of beeing together in the future. But I really would like to be with him in a couple of years, I just want to guarantee now that he doesn’t forget me, and opens up for the possibility of us being togheter, even with the long distance (Spain – London) at the moment. As long as there is hope, I got strength..

Lee says:


This is a very bad strategy. The more you text a boy, the less he will be attracted to you. This idea that he stopped writing back because he’s unsure whether you really like him is a girl’s bad interpretation of what goes on in a boy’s mind. If anything, I would guess that what happened is exactly the opposite. Your strong interest and your trip there killed the mystery that usually accompanies a new relationship, made him question your value, and – along with whatever else is going on in his life – made him decide that he is not attracted to you enough to warrant continuing contact. You can’t chase boys like this. You have to get them to come to you.

Alex says:

So I was meeting fellow freshman at the beginning of college, and this girl suddenly hugs me and says something like, “Ooh! He smells nice! And his hair is really soft!” Since then, she’s been super friendly and hugs me whenever we meet. Problem is, she’s with the navy and has a really busy schedule. I’ve tried asking her out to movies and stuff, but she’s rarely available (always happy to see me anyway). Plus there was this one time when I invited her, along with other friends, to my dorm for my birthday, but she couldn’t unlock the door to my hall and I didn’t hear my cellphone ring when she called… man I felt awful about that… :-(
She seems to like me, but I’m terrible at small talk and can never think of what to say… but more importantly, I’m worried that I don’t like her as much as I thought. I mean, what if it was just infatuation on my part because of how friendly she’s been? Should I risk ending up with a non-mutual relationship? Will I naturally grow more fond of her as we get closer? How DO I get closer, anyway? How can I tell if I like someone?

Dum Bass says:

Ok so I met this lass at a friends wedding, she was a bridesmaid it felt to me like their was attraction there from her side as their definitely was from me a lot of the old eye contact and smiles stuff, but I never got to speak to her properly typical shy guy but we’d been dancing next to each other in amongst a group of mutual friends. So when she leaves she introduces herself with a handshake then hugged a lad we both mutually know so I made a joke of it to him saying the handshake was so much better to which she came back and hugged me. Anyways months down the line I end up seeing her again at a meal a mate organised I didn’t get to speak to her that much then but we went to a pub after at both places she sat reasonably close to me so conversation could be made. So at the pub I moved across to her and started chatting with her but their were a couple of other people on the table so was talking a little to them, it was already getting late and she was saying how she was going to go so I backed off and just slid back across to some of my friends to see what she would do. The friends with her went to play pool next thing I know she’s sitting down at the table opposite me but not in the seat that would allow her to talk to the group I’m with who she also knows, so we just ended up chatting until she did leave just the two of us. When she left she went round everyone giving them a hug and came to me last? Here’s the bit where you want to slap me as I do, I didn’t ask her for her number. I figured we’re going out with her group of friends more so will see her again soon, why come across too eager? So sadly I hadn’t seen her in months then I went to a big party with a mate cos he was DJing and I help him with his gear and she was there she saw me as soon as I came in and just seemed to look intensely at me and I had to break my gaze at her to talk to someone but she was still looking at me then I had to clear off and set up and only saw her in passing later with a mutual smile and hi but to be fair I almost came across not interested during the night. I feel I screwed up with not getting her number previously and like I’ve lost all the work I initially put in, now I know when I see her again which I know will happen I’ll have to redo the groundwork again but have I screwed up completely or am I still in with a chance or would you say I probably wasn’t in the first place?

Rory says:

UPDATE on my story

I got after 5 months, all off the sudden this message from the guy I love in Spain:

He wrote: “You have to study and time will tell all but always smile,…SMILE ”

OMG !! I’m so happy ! Maybe, we will be togheter after all one day :D

Ana says:

So there is this guy I really like but he said that we should just be friends! But I want to be more then that. I text him and he wont text me back!!! Does that mean he doesn’t like me?

Selena says:

i think so girl :/

Max says:

Hey there! This is the ways her text message always starts. I’ll do my best with my english that is not very good looking. I really hope to get some help or advice from u guys.
This is my situacion: In the building where I live, I have a young couple of neighbors that are married. I’m not married but I also have a relationship too. The thing is that I really feel atract to this girl, and lately I think I like her too. This are the signals that I think why I like her.
A- she has a boyfriend
B-first time I met her I felt like she was trying to get my attention by talking and talking.
C-i asked her phone # in the elevator and she gave it to me.
D- first time whe hang was in her apart when her boyfriend was working, also she ask me before I went for something to drink.(on the other hand, she told me about she tell everything to her boyfriend, including that I was hanging with her in the apart, except the beer part)
E-she text me almost everyday. (i text her too)
F- everytime that I say Good bye, after the kiss she gives me a huge and hold me!! Why?????)
G- Sometimes she is pending when I go out or if my car is parking in the building.
H- she told me that she wanna text me in other moments, also that she sometimes writes the message and then delete it cause she is afraid of what my girlfriend is gonna think!
I- she smile every time she see me ( that make me crazy)

Pleaseee helpp meeeeeeee! Im not a shy guy, but Im not really sure whats going on.

kaned says:

this is one of the better ones on this topic. Thank Goodness for gay men!( I am straight for the record)

Max says:

I understand ur frustration dud.

Max says:

Bu thanks for ur time to write a comment :)

Racingstripepants says:

Congratulations on deciphering women’s lame bs attempts to show you that they are interested. No guy is going to pick up on that shit! Here’s some advice for the homies in bruj. Don’t be afraid to be straight up and blunt with women, do it in a humorous way. Show them that your interested, let them know what you want to do with them and do it fearlessly, have some balls and be bold. Its hard at first, just takes lots of practice. Good luck

Audrey says:

So first this guy works in the same building I do just in a different company; one day I was coming out of the restroom and he was around and he smiled, so I kinda of said hi.

Then, the other day he came where I work, but seemed kinda of quiet.

I’ve caught him staring at me, and we made eye contact like two times already.

And the last time he was hanging around where I was at that moment, and his coworkers were around, so he started to make jokes, and act goofy.. and I think he was just trying to be near me.


oh I forgot to mention, the other day I was somewhere else from I usually see him, I was walking, and I saw him walking and he kinda of was staring at his cell, he didn’t look at me, maybe he felt shy I don’t know.


Alex says:

I met a girl a few months ago who seemed to really like me.I danced with her and took her to a movie, but she’s with the navy and is usually too busy to do stuff. Since then I’ve seen her less and less, but I can’t stop thinking about her. She’s always so strangely happy to run into me, even though I rarely know what to say. Is she worth pursuing? I fear I might have missed my chance to do whatever it is I should have done to get closer…

john says:

i wish i could always be updated on ur letters

Dan says:

Hey I have been interested in this girl for about 4 weeks and have known her for about 3 months. Right now we work together in class and she tells me that I remind her of an actor who she says is cute. She also recently asked me to help her out a lot. With things such as Learnig to parallel park and she asked me to come early before class to help her. The other person I work with has known her for around the same amount of time as me and is a lot smarter. But she always asks me to help her even when he’s around. I feel like she is interested in me but I am afraid to ask cus that would make things awkward in class if she says no. I just want an opinion as to whether I should make my final move or wait a little longer. I am going to ask her out towards the end of the year but if the signs are right then sooner it will be. Please help?

MrAntiquity says:


Guessing you’re in high school? Be casual (that way it won’t be awkward either way. DON”T ask her if she’s interested–but DON’T wait either. What you want to do is have her join you somewhere–museum, friend’s party, maybe something fun on a weekend afternoon. You want to try to remove all this from the ‘school’ environment. Seems like you know her well enough at this point to ask.

Brandon says:

I have known this girl for about 6 months. We are both Juniors in high school and I like her, but I’m not sure if she feels the same way about me in order for me work up the courage to ask her out. I’ve noticed that she stares at me a lot when I am not looking, but when I make eye contact she looks away quickly before looking back again. She always smiles at me when she sees me in the hallways. She asked me to do something with her during the summer so she isn’t lonely, because she says I’m a nice person. Also, yesterday after school she sat next to me when there were plenty of empty seats and said “I like sitting by you.” I took out my earphones (without even thinking that by doing this, she’d think I didn’t hear her) and she thought I didn’t hear what she said, so she made a pouting like facial expression right before I told her I was kidding and said “I like sitting by you too” then she started smiling. This morning there weren’t that many people on the bus, so she said “I noticed how we are the only two people in a seat” and then giggled and smiled.
So, should I tell her how I feel, or am I just mistaking her being nice as being interested?

MrAntiquity says:

Sounds like she likes you. Definitely time to go for it. But be cool about it–why not ask her to do something outside of school? Museum, park, hike–etc.

Keep in mind that even if she does like you it’s not a guarantee that things will work–so you have to be ok with whatever the outcome is. But yeah.. go get her!

Brandon says:

She is on the wrestling team, studies a lot, and also tutors kids on the weekends. I’m not sure what type of place she would like to hang out at. I was just thinking about saying something in order to get her to ask me a certain question I came up with the perfect answer for.

Brandon says:

I meant for this to be a reply to Mr. Antiquity from yesterday, but accidentally made a new post.

Trevor says:

What does it mean when a girl sends you a text like this:

Hey boo ;*

Here are the texts for more info(she’s the blue and I’m the white):

Does this girl like me? I can be pretty oblivious sometimes. Btw, she doesn’t know who I am, we know each other, but I haven’t told her my identity yet and she said it’s killing her. She sent me that text today before noon after I didn’t text her for 2 days.

JONESY says:

Ummm, except for the hair twirl thing and an occasional asexual touch I have never had any of these signals from a woman in my life, and I’ve been married and had many girlfriends. All I get is the stalker type who out of the blue says (in front of my gf) that she’s gonna take me into a bathroom and do me right there, or some other such insane thing.

Bad juju could I must have been born under.

P.S.: I even had a platonic gf once who would touch my knees of all places (no, I didn’t make a move, she had a bf while I had a gf, but I could tell it meant nothing to her at all, like she did that to everyone).

Elias says:

Why does it mean when a girl mentions that she got hit in her lip and it hurts and then one of ur friends says I will kiss it and she says no and tells you that she wNts u to do it ?

Eric Disco says:

That means she likes you.


dave says:

Eric – Very effective “25 points” on how to recognize interest on the part of the woman ( Josef via Reddit), but it looks like you will have to be in that social setting and not standing on the edge somewhere.

Seth says:

I can’t tell if this girl likes me or not, thoughts?

me: You have the most amazing smile
her: Awh :’) thank you, Seth! You are always so sweet. :))
me: I was thinking the same thing, but sweet and gorgeous (:
her: :’) <3<3<3<3

Just a Guy says:

I’m clueless when it comes to signals. I can never tell if a girl is looking at me and thinking “mmm he’s cute” or if she’s thinking she just encountered the Elephant Man.

Also, I wonder if she’s laughing at me because I’m Hank Moody’s age and still doing my best to look good for my years, like some stereotypical old man trying to look young. I still have all of my hair, workout every other day, and wear jeans and black T-Shirts all of the time. Gay dudes and post menopausal women are much less subtle about “the look” they give me. But me no gay, and me no want old lady.

This shit is driving me crazy. I can’t see the body language signs (maybe a chick isn’t giving me any), and if I cold approach, my concern is she’s going to think some creepy old guy is hitting on her.
Yes, I know I shouldn’t care what a chick’s response is. Truth of the matter is I do.

adam says:

Would she be intrested if she asks do you like her hair to be styled she changes it to that?says yes when I say it looks good.

Brian says:

Best way to know if a girl is interested is to ask her out on a date or kiss her………..When you make bold moves you’ll know if she is interested. Why wait for hints? Rejection isn’t a big deal anyway. These hints are good to know anyway just to see who does like you if you’re busy with other things and don’t have times to chase girls.

Duckie says:

Well there’s this girl, she held my hand like with no problems, but I shoved it away by accident. Then she did it again and said “You know, I did this with my bestfriend the other day, and we walked together to……” with a happy and smiling face. Does this mean she’s flirting with me or is this like a normal thing to her?

TK says:

There’s a girl intersted in my looks and pics, my dressup, hairs, interested in bike riding with me, wants to see my cricket match even thoug she has no interest in cricket and talks to me on phone around 40 minutes. Does she loves me..??

Sum1 says:

To tk the girl is definetly into u but i cant really say whether or not she’s in love with u, but ask her out, take her to see a film she wants to see or take her out for a romantic meal

scot moran says:

Is it ok to ask a girl out who works in Cafeteria near by my apartment, it’s been a 2 months we been chatting and during day time she is really busy and not enough time to talk? Not sure

Any help would be appreciated. Thanks

Hurricane Lee says:

If anything, you’ve waited too long. The longer you wait, the more girls think that you’re scared of them. You should have asked her out after fifteen minutes.


Amor says:

Hello Lee,

I’m going to have to disagree on this relying myself on my own trial & error experience. 15 minutes is not enough time to qualify,demonstrate value, etc., I would only do it if I know for sure that I will not see her again, and it’s all or nothing only then I would ask for her number (not a date) after 15 mins. In my opinion asking for a date after only 15 mins of meeting someone makes you look desperate, way too desperate!

MrAntiquity says:


Sure it is. BUt it’s case by case–you can move things along in 2 minutes so that you can ask for a date. My BIGGEST MISTAKE in college (and for years afterward) was thinking like you are now–that I needed this strong, deep, solid connection before asking for a phone number. I was dead wrong. All you need to do is establish (non-verbally) that you like each other–this can be immediate, or you can work things for a few minutes. Sometimes a long conversation is great, too–but there’s no time requirement.