Comments on: How to Break Up with Her–and Deal with the Anxiety http://approachanxiety.com/2009/09/how-to-break-up-with-her-and-deal-with-the-anxiety/ Turn Your Fear of Approaching Women into Confidence Thu, 17 May 2012 20:25:48 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Paul http://approachanxiety.com/2009/09/how-to-break-up-with-her-and-deal-with-the-anxiety/comment-page-1/#comment-39017 Paul Thu, 24 Nov 2011 05:49:08 +0000 http://approachanxiety.com/?p=289#comment-39017 I broke up with my girlfriend of 3 years about a month ago, and I must have read this article a dozen times before I finally went through with it. I was dealing with such stress beforehand that I almost felt physically sick the days leading up to it. One piece of advice that I will give is repeating the words "I want to break up" over and over as you drive to their house. Each time say it imagining they're right in front of you. The more I said it, the less I was emotionally impacted by it, and I was able to reduce the anxiety enough during the actual confrontation. I broke up with my girlfriend of 3 years about a month ago, and I must have read this article a dozen times before I finally went through with it. I was dealing with such stress beforehand that I almost felt physically sick the days leading up to it.

One piece of advice that I will give is repeating the words “I want to break up” over and over as you drive to their house. Each time say it imagining they’re right in front of you. The more I said it, the less I was emotionally impacted by it, and I was able to reduce the anxiety enough during the actual confrontation.

]]> By: Tec http://approachanxiety.com/2009/09/how-to-break-up-with-her-and-deal-with-the-anxiety/comment-page-1/#comment-38969 Tec Wed, 09 Nov 2011 12:25:33 +0000 http://approachanxiety.com/?p=289#comment-38969 Recently broke up with a girl. She was devastated. I've been feeling really shitty about it, so I sought this article out, and I'm glad I did because the advice here is golden. Thank you Eric Recently broke up with a girl. She was devastated. I’ve been feeling really shitty about it, so I sought this article out, and I’m glad I did because the advice here is golden.

Thank you Eric

]]> By: Melissa http://approachanxiety.com/2009/09/how-to-break-up-with-her-and-deal-with-the-anxiety/comment-page-1/#comment-38164 Melissa Wed, 15 Jun 2011 06:36:00 +0000 http://approachanxiety.com/?p=289#comment-38164 I had my first major break-up a few months ago-- I'd dated a guy for two and a half years and he finally ended it to be with another girl. Came across this site by accident and just wanted to say that this article really rang true from the girl's perspective. My ex had anxiety issues and in retrospect the anxiety explains many of his actions leading to the break-up. Now a few months later I'm tempted to reply to some of his recent messages ("I miss you", "let's get dinner" etc) and this is helping me resist the temptation! Thanks for a useful resource-- most of the other stuff on the Internet is total crap. I had my first major break-up a few months ago– I’d dated a guy for two and a half years and he finally ended it to be with another girl. Came across this site by accident and just wanted to say that this article really rang true from the girl’s perspective. My ex had anxiety issues and in retrospect the anxiety explains many of his actions leading to the break-up.
Now a few months later I’m tempted to reply to some of his recent messages (“I miss you”, “let’s get dinner” etc) and this is helping me resist the temptation! Thanks for a useful resource– most of the other stuff on the Internet is total crap.

]]> By: Zhelyazko http://approachanxiety.com/2009/09/how-to-break-up-with-her-and-deal-with-the-anxiety/comment-page-1/#comment-38064 Zhelyazko Mon, 23 May 2011 11:56:49 +0000 http://approachanxiety.com/?p=289#comment-38064 Thanks Cameron Thanks Cameron

]]> By: Cameron http://approachanxiety.com/2009/09/how-to-break-up-with-her-and-deal-with-the-anxiety/comment-page-1/#comment-38062 Cameron Mon, 23 May 2011 09:02:18 +0000 http://approachanxiety.com/?p=289#comment-38062 You could always wait until after the event to dump her, that way you get to avoid the tension. But a better way for your growth as a man would be to dump her now and then deal with the tension unapologetically when/if it it comes up. You could always wait until after the event to dump her, that way you get to avoid the tension.

But a better way for your growth as a man would be to dump her now and then deal with the tension unapologetically when/if it it comes up.

]]> By: Zhelyazko http://approachanxiety.com/2009/09/how-to-break-up-with-her-and-deal-with-the-anxiety/comment-page-1/#comment-38059 Zhelyazko Sun, 22 May 2011 20:13:45 +0000 http://approachanxiety.com/?p=289#comment-38059 Hey Guys. Can you help me out ? Here is my story. There is this girl i went on a date with and it was allright but I am not feeling it at all now. And I want to end this but I can't simply pull away because we will be at the same event 1 day from now. I am very confused ? Do I call/text/e-mail her beforehand and what do I tell her or do I wait for the event ? I know I do not give a lot of info but what would be the best course of action ? Hey Guys. Can you help me out ?

Here is my story. There is this girl i went on a date with and it was allright but I am not feeling it at all now. And I want to end this but I can’t simply pull away because we will be at the same event 1 day from now.

I am very confused ? Do I call/text/e-mail her beforehand and what do I tell her or do I wait for the event ?

I know I do not give a lot of info but what would be the best course of action ?

]]> By: RSmith http://approachanxiety.com/2009/09/how-to-break-up-with-her-and-deal-with-the-anxiety/comment-page-1/#comment-38010 RSmith Wed, 11 May 2011 03:23:38 +0000 http://approachanxiety.com/?p=289#comment-38010 Hi, I've come back to finish the last post... one year ago! I delt with the anxiety of leaving the missus and left. I realize this article was written for breaking up with girlfriends (weeks or months together?) and maybe not someone who you have dedicated 9 years of your life and planned a wedding with. But hey, reading it helped and it was the best decision I have ever made. I went through a massive depression for 4 months, packed up and left everything I knew for half a year working in Japan. Came back with a new perspective on life and loving every moment. I think the biggest lesson here is not to undervalue yourself and realize your own worth. When you do this you can put your own needs and desires first and make decisions that are best for you and not live a life for anyone else. I don't mean this in a selfish sense, because once you can fully give to yourself, you can offer alot more of your true self to others. Hi,

I’ve come back to finish the last post… one year ago! I delt with the anxiety of leaving the missus and left. I realize this article was written for breaking up with girlfriends (weeks or months together?) and maybe not someone who you have dedicated 9 years of your life and planned a wedding with. But hey, reading it helped and it was the best decision I have ever made. I went through a massive depression for 4 months, packed up and left everything I knew for half a year working in Japan. Came back with a new perspective on life and loving every moment. I think the biggest lesson here is not to undervalue yourself and realize your own worth. When you do this you can put your own needs and desires first and make decisions that are best for you and not live a life for anyone else. I don’t mean this in a selfish sense, because once you can fully give to yourself, you can offer alot more of your true self to others.

]]> By: RSmith http://approachanxiety.com/2009/09/how-to-break-up-with-her-and-deal-with-the-anxiety/comment-page-1/#comment-34758 RSmith Mon, 10 May 2010 06:30:43 +0000 http://approachanxiety.com/?p=289#comment-34758 I agree with Ryan in the above post, this is the BEST article there is on the topic. I've been searching the web all day on this topic and I am SO GLAD I came across this article. So much insight. It's amazing that sometimes the best advice comes from puas / those who dedicate a large part of their life understanding the dynamics of women, relationships and themselves. It's also amazing that sometimes the worst, uneducated, simplistic material comes from those who claim to know it the best - councilors and other 'self help gurus'. I'll be reading over this article a lot in the next few days as I build up the strength and courage to end a 9 year relationship with a women I am engaged with. I agree with Ryan in the above post, this is the BEST article there is on the topic. I’ve been searching the web all day on this topic and I am SO GLAD I came across this article. So much insight.

It’s amazing that sometimes the best advice comes from puas / those who dedicate a large part of their life understanding the dynamics of women, relationships and themselves. It’s also amazing that sometimes the worst, uneducated, simplistic material comes from those who claim to know it the best – councilors and other ‘self help gurus’.

I’ll be reading over this article a lot in the next few days as I build up the strength and courage to end a 9 year relationship with a women I am engaged with.

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