There are two basic styles of initiating interactions with women you don’t know.  One is ‘direct’ and the other ‘indirect.’

When you are direct, you are up front about the fact that you are interested in her and you let her know right from the very start.

An example of that might be “Hey, I just had to come tell you that you are unbelievably cute! My name’s Eric.”

When you are indirect, you act as if you are interacting with her for another reason other than sexual interest.

An example would be asking a girl “Hey, do you know how to get to the library from here?”

Both styles are great.  Continue Reading »

I was out with a client recently and we spotted a very hot girl.

I asked him what he was feeling when he thought about talking to her.

“What could I possibly have to offer her?” he said to me.

It is one of the biggest components of approach anxiety.

You get an overwhelming feeling that this woman in front of you somehow has more intrinsic value than you.

You are looking at her through the lens of attraction.

And it’s easy to assume that her life is more interesting than yours. If she is gorgeous, she probably gets A LOT of doors opened to her.

Maybe she goes to exciting parties. Maybe rich handsome studs take her sailing in the Carribean. Or she goes on helicopter rides around New York City with celebrities like P Diddy.

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This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

-Rumi

Sometimes you meet a woman who seems to have a very exciting life.

Perhaps she’s young and likes to party.

Or she rubs elbows with famous people.

Or she’s very successful at what she does.

And in a lot of ways it seems impossible to compete.

A few weeks ago I met a girl at a coffee shop. We ended up back at my place that day.

We got really intimate and had a great time.

The next day she left for a week to go to LA for a video premier.

She was a model and was in a video for some famous rock band.

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Recently on the forum, someone posted a question.

“What must a guy do to grow up and become a real man?”

I have strong feelings about that.

It has nothing to do with how many women you bed.

Or how much you accomplish in life.

And it certainly has nothing to do with disrespecting women in general.

Or losing your ability to feel for another person.

Instead, it comes down to one single thing.

Here is the most important thing a guy must do if he wants to be ‘real man.’

If you can do this, you have become a man, mastered inner game, taken hold of your reality:

Continue Reading »