Comments on: Feel Less Confident Than Yesterday? It’s Natural.

By: Approach Anxiety » Will Learning to Approach Make You Happy?

Approach Anxiety » Will Learning to Approach Make You Happy? — Fri, 04 Jun 2010 18:31:13 +0000

[...] I’ve talked about it before, that confidence fluctuates in cycles. [...]

By: Eric Sire

Eric Sire — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 12:14:01 +0000

Also forgot to mention EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) as a tool to remove bad feelings and states. Very powerful. Check it up on Google :)

By: Eric Sire

Eric Sire — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 21:17:53 +0000

Using NLP and the anchoring technique can help during these lowdowns.

By: Social

Social — Mon, 11 May 2009 17:01:01 +0000

so im seeing a lot of trouble with people getting dates and phone numbers. each situation is diffrent obvioulsy. but i had this deliema myself. my solution. dont get the number. its sounds odd but i highly recommend that when you sarge on a girl that you dont even ask for her number. dont even think about it when she is about to leave.

the reason why i personally recommend this is because when you establish a conclusion to what you expect. then your only focus becomes how to get there. rather then living in the interaction or in the present we focus on the future and in turn expect certain events. DONT Expect anything. just live in the moment like when you surf a wave (any surfers?) you cant expect to ride it smoothly with out a wipe out, because every wave is diffrent.

in conclusion let her ask you for your number. dont has for her’s. you’ll feel better for making her entire WEEK by cheering her up and flirting which NO one ever does. =)

stay social

By: Brad

Brad — Sun, 10 May 2009 17:07:43 +0000

Funny thing is I have basically defeated AA (this site has helped out ALOT – thank you Eric) but I cant get a number or a date to save my life. Its very discouraging. Women always claim “we want to be approached by cool guys” – do they? I really wonder with some of the chodes I see them with and most have personalities of bricks….

By: VooDoo

VooDoo — Fri, 08 May 2009 17:47:02 +0000

My God.. this approach anxiety stuff is getting on my nerves. I’ve been dealing with this stuff for a month and still i can’t approach a woman without feeling EXTREMELY anxious. I wonder if sarging with people who know about the game would reduce my AA. I took a Bootcamp a month ago and i was opening left and right.. but when the Bootcamp was over, and i had to sarge by myself, the AA returned and i couldn’t even open a single set! That’s insane!!

By: relentless d

relentless d — Fri, 08 May 2009 05:02:55 +0000

Man, if I didnt have the knowledge of the success I had beforehand, I’d be at an all time low right now. The fire I once had seems to have dissipated greatly. Sure, its been flickering on & off over the past months, but overall, I’m really having a hard time igniting that true flame.

I have now fallen into the rythm where my focus is off. In fact it is very off, approaching women nowadays has rarely reaches the top of my to do list. I’m still social and whatnot, never really turned that off, but I know for a fact I haven’t taken approaches seriously. And the fact I’ve avoided interactions is a sign of myself reverting to my old ways…grrr…. I’ve become blinded by other things, and I keep putting this shit off.

Thats no excuse. I know I am my own worst enemy, and I know what must be done.

By: Eric Disco

Eric Disco — Thu, 07 May 2009 16:46:58 +0000

I know this sounds crazy but really take a look around and you will see that either its the the beat up beta guy or the absolute jerk that gets the woman…so a decent guy sees this and thinks – maybe I should turn into a jerk or a creep and then presto – he starts getting dates….interesting paradox…

From the outside it seems as if “jerks get dates with women.” Displaying assholishness vs. being nice is a more effective method. But think of it more as a symptom rather than the actual issue.

Most guys around beautiful women are not “themselves.” They are so not used to being around such attractive women that their bodies physically respond in ways that short-circuit who they truly are. They become inhibited and “nice,” and, while they may logically not want to do so, they start to suck up, kiss ass, and be as non-confrontational as possible.

I wouldn’t recommend becoming a jerk. There are much more important ways to improve yourself around women that don’t involve betraying who you are. Simply becoming a jerk will not get you where you want to go.

Yes, as a by-product of your confidence with women, you will become less “careful” of what you say around women–and this will be attractive. But trying to be an asshole as your first move will not get you very far.

Eric